A Bunch of One Shots Featuring the Outers
by Tache
Summary: I think the title explains it all. Just some one shots. Some may relate to my series other series.
1. Stop Hurting Mama!

Well here's the first in my series of one shots. I hope you'll find them to be funny and enjoyable. This first one will take place 3 years after the birth of Haruka's and Michiru's daughter, Naoyukiyo. It will also be told from her point of view. Hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

Stop Hurting Mama!

Hi there everyone! For those of you who don't know, my name is Naoyukiyo Tenoh, daughter of Haruka and Michiru Tenoh. My papa and mama call me Naoyu for short, everyone does actually. I'm 3 years old. My papa is a girl and so is mama. It is rather interesting to had 2 girl parents. I also have an aunt named Setsuna and an older sister named Hotaru. OK, they're not really my family, but I call them that anyways. The real fun thing about my family is that they are all sailor senshi. Papa is Sailor Uranus, mama is Sailor Neptune, Aunt Setsuna is Sailor Pluto, and Hotaru is Sailor Saturn. Cool right? We also are friends with the rest of the sailor senshi. I'm good friends with Chibiusa, a.k.a. Sailor Chibimoon. Well enough of that, on with the story.

It was close to midnight when I woke up that one night from a terrible nightmare. My first thought was to go to mama and papa. They would help me feel better. I ran to there room and entered without knocking. I was shocked at what I saw. Papa was on top of mama and she looked to be hurting her in some form. Mama was moaning with pain underneath her. I ran up to them and did a dive bomb on papa.

"Stop hurting mama!" I screamed as I landed on her. Papa uffed when I landed on her bare back. Why were they both naked anyways? Adults are silly. She and mama both looked at me in shock.

"Naoyu, what are you doing here?" Mama asked me.

"I had a bad dream, but I'm fine now. Now my main concern is protecting you from papa. Wasn't she just hurting you earlier?" I asked. Mama blushed for some reason. Why was she blushing?

"No, she wasn't hurting me. Now will you get off her before you hurt her even more?" Mama told me. I crawled off papa and headed towards the door, but turned back to face them.

"Mama, I swear, I won't let papa hurt you again." I said and with that, I headed back top bed for the night.

The next morning, I went downstairs for breakfast. Aunt Setsuna and Hotaru were already at the time.

"Morning, Naoyu." Aunt Setsuna greeted. I smiled up at her.

"Morning, Aunt Setsuna." I greeted back. I took my seat at the table and began to eat. "Do you know papa was hurting mama last night?" I asked out of nowhere.

"Huh, she was?" Aunt Setsuna replied.

"Why would she do that?" Hotaru asked.

"I don't know, but when I walked in, papa was on top of mama doing something and mama was moaning. They were both naked too for some reason." I told them. Both Aunt Setsuna and Hotaru then blushed for some reason. Why are adults always blushing? I know Hotaru isn't an adult yet, but she is a teenager.

"Um, Naoyu, I don't think your papa was hurting your mama." Aunt Setsuna told me. Huh, if she wasn't hurting her, then what was she doing? She sees my confused look. "You'll understand when you're older." What would I understand? Was this some sort of an adult thing? I guess I would need to talk to Chibiusa about this today. Good thing she was visiting from the 30th century.

Later that afternoon, Chibiusa and I were at the park. But we weren't there to play today. Today we were there to talk.

"So last night," I began, "I walked into mama and papa's room and papa was hurting mama." Chibiusa gasped.

"No way, what was she doing?" She asked.

"Papa was on top of mama. They were both naked and mama was moaning underneath her." I told her. Chibiusa gasped again.

"Why would Haruka-san do such a thing?" She asked. She thought a little harder. "Come to think of it, I remember one night a couple years ago when I walked in on my papa hurting my mama. I didn't think much of it, I thought that baka had done something stupid again and was being punished. I never did understand why they were both naked though."

"And what was your papa doing to your mama?" I asked her.

"I don't know quite how to explain it. He was on top of her and seemed to be doing repeated body slams on her." She explained the best she could. It was my turn to gasp.

"That is almost like what my papa was doing to mama." I said. Some random kids then walked over to us. They seemed to have over heard our conversation.

"Yeah, I walked in on my papa doing something like that to mama too." One boy said.

"Same here." Some other kids said. Chibiusa and I both gasps. Just how many incidents of papas hurting mamas were there? Chibiusa turned to me.

"Naoyu, you don't think this is some wide spread conspiracy between papas to hurt mamas, do you." She asked me.

"It just might be." I said. "We need to stop this, for the sake of mamas everywhere." All the kids nodded.

"What should we do?" One girl asked. I thought for a few minutes. What could we do to stop the papas? Well we needed to do something.

"OK, here's the plan. The papas seem to take action at night when we are sleeping. Everyone stay up late tonight and catch them in action. Then punish your papa for his crimes." I explained. All the kids nodded. I sure hoped this worked.

That night, instead of going to sleep like a good little girl, I stayed up in my room playing video games. I waited till midnight, then transformed into Sailor Chibiuranus.

"Uranus Planet Power, Make Up!" I cried. After I transformed, I snuck out of my room to my parents. I stopped in front of there door. I could hear mama moaning from the other side. So, papa was hurting her again. I would put an end to it tonight. I burst in.

"Stop hurting mama!" I screamed. "Chibi World Shaking!" I unleashed my attack and it hit papa right in the butt.

"Ow!" She screamed and jumped up clutching her butt. "Naoyu, now what are you doing?"

"In the name of Uranus, I'm here to stop you from hurting mama." I told her. She sighed and put her robe on. She then picked me and placed me on her lap.

"Naoyu, I wasn't planning on telling you this till you were older, much older, like a teenager, but it seems my safety is at risk if I don't. You see Naoyu, what your mama and I were doing was..." A few minutes later I was screaming.

Meanwhile, in the 30th century (Normal Point of View)

Their bed room was dark and full of load moans.

"Oh! Yes! Mamo-chan! Harder! Faster!" Came a female voice.

"Yes, you like that, don't you Usako?" A male voice. Suddenly this was interrupted by the door bursting open.

"Don't hurt mama! Pink Sugar Heart Attack!" A young female voice screamed. Pink heart went blasting at the male. He screamed and rolled over. The heart then got him down there. He screamed in more pain and clutched the injured area.

"Now you will never be able to hurt mama again!" And with that, the young female left.

The End! (Of this one shot)

Well I hope you all like this first of what I hope to be many one shots. Please review!


	2. Haruka's iPod

Hi again. I'm so glad so many people liked the last one shot. Sorry, but I've been having trouble thinking of something just as good for my next one shot. This one just came to me after dealing with troubles on my iPod. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon or work in any way for Apple, so I don't own any rights to the iPod either.

Haruka's iPod

I don't know quite how to explain how this all happened. I can hardly believe it either, but Crystal Tokyo is now upon us. All because of this thing. Well I guess you are all wondering what happened. Well let me explain that to you.

It was a nice, beautiful day a few months ago. I was into the shopping district with Michiru, Setsuna, and Hotaru. We were just having a nice family outing. We were walking around talking about random things, like Setsuna complaining on how loud Michiru and I were last night. I was seriously considering finding her a lover today so she'd stop complaining. So they we were, minding our own business when suddenly.

"Excuse me sir! You look like a lucky man." Some random vendor said to me. Huh? I looked lucky? Was it because I was walking around with 2 beautiful women and a child? I turned to the man. He was behind one of those lottery booths. Those one where you give them money and they spin some container full of balls around till one falls out and if a certain color ball comes out you win a prize. Well, I guess it was worth a try.

"OK, I'll take a shot then." I said as I approached the man and handed him some money. He spun the container and a blue ball came out.

"Congratulations!" He yelled, "You're our big winner!" Wow, lucky me. I wonder what I won. He reached under his counter and pulled out a brand new iPod.

"You're the winner of this brand new iPod!" He told me. Wow! I won an iPod. What would I do with it anyways? Put Michiru's violin music on it? I wasn't really the type that listened to music much anyways. Oh well.

Later that night, I had my brand new iPod connected to my computer and was just about ready to kill something.

"Why isn't this working?!?!" I screamed and banged my fists on the table. My family looked at me like I had gone crazy, well maybe I have.

"What's wrong with you?" Setsuna asked.

"This stupid thing won't recognize my iPod!" I screamed and kick some random plant over. Hotaru jumped to the plant's assistance.

"Have you tried going to their website?" Michiru asked me. "Go there first. Maybe they have a solution."

"OK, I will." After a few more hours and a few more kicked over plants, my iPod finally had some songs on it. Not only had I put some of Michiru's violin music on it, but I also put some songs from Sera Myu on it as well.

The next day, I was driving in my car and listening to my iPod. Wow, some of these songs were rather catchy. I started to sing them out loud. Since my car is open roof, people on the sidewalk were staring at me strangely. I kept on driving till I came to a stop light. I looked around and saw the inners on the sidewalk up ahead. I waited till the light turned green then pulled up beside them. They all got stars in their eyes when they saw me.

"Haruka-san!" They all said. I could swear drool was coming out of their mouths.

"Hi girls!" I said back. They all swooned. Minako then noticed my new toy.

"Wow, is that an iPod?" She asked me. I nodded. All the inners squealed like crazy school girls. Wait, they are crazy school girls. I guess that makes sense then. I then decided just to wink at them and drive away.

Later that evening, I was sitting at home still listening to my iPod. Michiru was sitting beside me. She leaned over to me and began to kiss me. I barely paid attention to her since I was listening to one of my favorite songs, Harsh Saint Cry. Michiru got annoyed when I didn't respond to her kiss.

"Haruka!" She scolded. Again, I didn't pay attention. She then smacked me, hard. That got my attention.

"Ow! What is wrong with you?" I asked angrily.

"What's wrong with me?!?!" She shot back. "The real question is what's wrong with you? Do you not want to have sex?"

"Of course I do." I replied. I leaned down to kiss her but got smacked me again.

"Oh no you don't! Not until you turn off that iPod!" She screamed. Huh, but I was listening to it.

"I can't do that. I love these songs!" I told her. She was ready to scream some more, until our communicators went off. Michiru grabbed her communicator and answered it enraged.

"What is it?!?!" She spat. On the screen, I could see Sailor Mercury looking a bit frightened.

"Um, there's a monster attacking Tokyo. Michiru-san, is this a bad time for you? Are you and Haruka-san, um, you know, um, doing, um, it?" Mercury asked a bit shyly.

"No, and if Haruka continues to put that stupid iPod before me, she'll be sleeping on the couch for a year!" Michiru spat back. Mercury sweat dropped.

"So, are we going to go fight the monster?" I asked. Michiru growled. Hum, with Michiru in this mood, I feel rather sorry for the monster.

A few minutes later, we arrived, transformed, to where the monster was attacking. I still had my iPod on me. I walked up to the monster and said, "Stop right there!" It turned to face me. I fiddled with my iPod a bit, then began singing Making for the Right. This seemed to enrage Neptune even more for some reason.

"Deep Submerge!" She screamed. Ack, she didn't even wait for me to move. I barely dodged that. It hit the monster full force, but it didn't die. Neptune looked ready to pop. Suddenly the ocean started flooding everything. Was this the end of the world?

When I finally woke up, things were really different. I looked around confused. This didn't look like the Tokyo I knew. This looked like, gasp, Crystal Tokyo! How did this happen? I thought a whole bunch of weird stuff was supposed to happen before Crystal Tokyo was formed. Did I sleep through those stuff? Queen Serenity walked over to me at that moment.

"Uranus, due to Neptune's anger, Crystal Tokyo was formed years before it was scheduled. She tells me she was angry because of your iPod. So from this day forth, I'm outlawing iPods." She told me.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" I screamed.

The End!

Well, I hoped you liked this one shot. I think my next one will be up on Friday. I plan for the next one to be about Haruka's birthday, which is on the 27th. I decided on Friday since my birthday is on Friday.


	3. Haruka's Birthday

Well here's the next one shot! Since it's my birthday today (I'm turning 18), and according to official information, Haruka's birthday is January 27th, I decided this one shot should be about Haruka's birthday. I decided she should turn 18 in this.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

Haruka's Birthday

I woke up that morning. It was January 27th, my birthday. I wonder what Michiru got me this year. She's been asking me what I wanted for a few weeks now. Every time I answered with 'I don't know.' I guess this means my presents will be a surprise then. I got up and went downstairs. Michiru, Setsuna, and Hotaru were already down there. As I walked down they all yelled out.

"Happy Birthday, Haruka!" They all screamed. It was a good thing I was still young and had a good heart or I may have had a heart attack. I smiled at them as I walked over to them.

"And good morning to all of you." I said, "So, do I get to open presents now?" I asked.

"Can't you wait till everyone arrives for your party?" Michiru asked me. I made a pouty face at her and gave her puppy dog eyes. She sighed as she gave in. "OK, you can open one for now." I cheered as she went into the living room and returned with a wrapped gift. I opened it like an excited child.

"Wow,a t-shirt and a hoody." I said when I had opened it. Michiru had gotten me a white t-shirt and a red hoody with 'JAPAN' written across it. "Thanks Michiru." I said and placed a kiss on her cheek. I went upstairs to get dressed in my new t-shirt and hoody.

That afternoon, the inners, Mamoru, and the star lights all arrived at our house for my party. The inners were as crazy as ever when they walked in. Usagi ran up to me and jumped into my arms, almost knocking me over.

"Happy Birthday, Haruka-san!" She yelled. I hugged her back.

"Thank you, Usagi-chan." I said as I put her down. Minako jumped up and down like crazy.

"Let's party!" She screamed. Usagi joined her. Why did I have the feeling they would tear down the house?

"What should we play?" Makoto asked. Minako pulled a bottle out of her bag.

"Spin the bottle!" She screamed. Hum, that would give me a good excuse to kiss the inners. I was in. Ami, Michiru and Setsuna were also in with a bit of persuading.

"Haruka-san, since it's your birthday, I think you should go first." Minako told me. I smirked and spun the bottle. I wonder who I would get to kiss. The bottle spun around and around andaround to stop on… Seiya. Everybody then 'Oooohhhed' for some reason.

"God, anybody but him." I grumbled. All the inners were laughing at this point. Seiya smirked.

"Would you feel better if I transformed into Star Fighter first?" He asked me. I growled at him. I picked up the bottle and chucked it at him. "OW! Watch it!"

"Don't make fun of it." I said. "You know what, since you're really a girl, you're just as much a lesbian." He got up.

"That does it." He approached me.

"Will you two just kiss already?" Minako asked. I glared at her, but she glared back ten times worse. I sighed and kissed Seiya. Flashes instantly went off around us. Where the hell did they all get cameras from? We continued to play, with a lot of weird couples happening. Most funny has got to have been that when Usagi spun the bottle, it stopped on herself.

"Now what do I do?" She asked.

"You have to kiss yourself." Rei told her. Usagi instantly started to kiss the air. When Michiru spun the bottle, it stopped on me, much to my pleasure. We both kissed passionately.

After the game, it was time to open presents. Usagi ran up to me first with her present.

"I hope you like it, Haruka-san." She said. I opened it. It was a box of candy. I never knew she would give anyway candy and not eat it herself.

"Thank you, Usagi-chan." I continued to open presents. I got lots a great things like clothes, car parts, CDs, movies, games, and stuff like that. Seiya approached me last with his present.

"Haruka-san, I know we've never been on good terms, but I feel this is something every man, or in your case, boyish lesbian," I glared at him, "should have." He handed me the box and I opened it. Inside were a bunch of Playboy magazines and porno movies. I took one of the magazines out of the box and started to look at it. Boy, it was hot.

"Wow!" I said. Mamoru picked up one of the magazines, but was immediately swatted by Usagi.

"How dare you even think of looking at other women?!" She yelled at him. He was in trouble. Michiru then walked up to me. I may be in trouble now.

"Haruka, what are these?" She asked as she picked up one of the magazines. She looked at it for a few minutes before saying, "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom." Wow, she was even more perverted then I was. Everyone stared as she went off.

"That was unexpected." Rei commented. Yeah, well receiving porn was unexpected too. I turn back to my magazine and continue to drool. How could this get any better.

"Mamo-chan, I'm way hotter then any of those women and I can prove it!" Usagi shouted and ripped off her shirt. I could almost feel the blood squirting out of my nose. Mamoru gawked at her.

"Wow." Was all he said.

"Do you believe me now or do I need to take more clothes off?" She asked. I believe you, but more clothes off would be nice too.

"Hum," said Mamoru, "I think you better take more clothes off." He said. Usagi then pounded on him.

"Mamo-chan no baka!" She screamed. Yup, this was turning into a great birthday.

The End!

Well that it for that one. I don't know what I'll write next. Maybe I should write one about Setsuna or Hotaru. I don't know yet. Review!


	4. The Outers at the Super Bowl

Well here's the next one shot. I'm glad you all liked the last one. Thanks to everyone who reviewed. Now this one may not be the fav of non-sports fans, but I think you can still enjoy it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon nor am I associated with the NFL.

The Outers at the Super Bowl

Here I was, at the Tokyo air port with Michiru, Setsuna, and Hotaru. I had entered an ultimate sports contest last month and had won 4 tickets to the Super Bowl. I admit, I wasn't a big fan of American football, but the idea at being at a sporting event so big really excited me. Finally the announcement came.

"The flight to Arizona is now boarding. All first class passengers may now board." That was us. I was glad we had gotten first class seats. I wasn't thrilled at the idea of being crammed next to some weirdo for an entire day. We picked up our bags and boarded the plane.

A few hours later we were in the air traveling. I loved our first class seats. It was so roomy and the serves was excellent. Hotaru turned to me excitedly.

"So, who do you think will win?" She asked me.

"I don't know. The Patriots have had an undefeated season so far, but the Giants did beat the Cowboys and Packers to get to this game and they were 2 of the top teams." I told her.

"I think your papa is trying to say, it's anybody's game." Michiru told Hotaru.

"I just hope the game is easy to understand." Setsuna said. In that case, she may not understand it. She had a hard time understanding the basics of car racing.

After a long time in the air, we finally arrived in Arizona. I cheered as were got off the plane. We were finally here. We were going to have the time of our lives. We grabbed all our luggage and went outside. There was a limo waiting for us. We walked up to the guy holding up a sign with "Tenoh" written on it.

"Are you Haruka Tenoh?" he asked me. I nodded and showed him my I.D. He smiled and opened the limo door for us. We hopped in and we were off to the day before party. This should be fun. An entire night of drinking and watching girls. Hopefully Michiru wouldn't get to upset.

The party was a blast. I was already on my 3rd beer. Girls were dancing around on stage in sexy referee outfits. Michiru loosened up too once I convinced her this was OK. She was still on her first beer. Setsuna on the other hand had gone crazy. She had already drunk 10 beers. She had decided to join the sexy girls on stage.

"I hope she'll be feeling better to watch the game tomorrow." I whispered to Michiru. She just nodded beside me.

The next day we dragged a major hung over Setsuna down to the stadium. She complained the entire way.

"Well if you didn't drink so much the night before, you'd be feeling better." Michiru told her. That was true.

"Well I'm amazed she's still alive." Hotaru said.

"I think it would take much more to kill the mighty Guardian of Time then that." I said. "If she can die at the end of the Death Buster's battle then come back when the Star Lights arrive, I think she's immortal."

"But I could have sworn we saw her before then, in a movie of some sort." Michiru said. I shrugged my shoulders at that. Why would Setsuna be in a movie anyways? Once we finally gotten to our seats, Setsuna fell asleep right away. Seems like she'd miss the game. Oh well, at least we wouldn't have to explain everything to her. The players took the field. After a few minutes, the opening kick happened. The game was on it's way and everyone cheered.

"Haruka, turn down the TV." Setsuna mumbled. Poor girl. The game went pretty smoothly at first. Both teams were doing good. That is until a monster appeared on the field.

"Haruka-papa, is there supposed to be a monster on the field?" Hotaru asked.

"I don't think so." I said.

"Transform!" Michiru said. With that, we all transformed, except for Setsuna who is still sleeping. We confronted the monster.

"Stop right there!" We yelled at us. It turned to face us.

"World Shaking!"

"Deep Submerge!" The attacks did nothing. It attacked us back.

"Silent Wall!" Saturn defended us. She confronted the monster. "If you're not a good little monster, I'll have to end the world." She threatened.

"Um, isn't that a bit drastic?" I asked. Michiru nodded in panic. Suddenly we heard a noise behind us. We turned around just in time for…

"Dead Scream!" Pluto yelled, not whispered. Wow, she must be cranky if she yelled her attack, she never does that. The monster was caught of guard and destroyed. Well, that was the end of that.

The game was a complete success after that. The NFL had even given Pluto a medal of honor for saving the game. She was still a bit cranky when receiving it though. I reminded my self never to let her drink again.

The End!

Please review!


	5. I Dare You

Sorry that I haven't updated in awhile. I've had a bit of trouble thinking of my next idea. I knew I promised something with Setsuna or Hotaru starring, but this idea is too good to pass up. I promise one of them will star in the next one. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

I Dare You

It was Saturday afternoon at the race track. I was there practicing with the rest of my team. It started off as just a simple practice, but it turned into a game of dare. How did it turn into a game of dare? Well that is an interesting story.

"Hey, Joe!" One of my team mates, Yuta, yelled out, "I dare you to not break while going around that first turn!" Joe looked at him from his car.

"Are you crazy? That's suicide!" Joe cried back.

"What ever you say chicken!" Yuta cried back. I decided to join in on the fun.

"If you do it, and live, I'll show you a suggestive picture of Michiru." I told him. That lit his spirits up. He revved up his car. My manager, Kamada, turned to me.

"You shouldn't encourage recklessness." He told you. "Michiru-san won't be happy if she ever finds out about this." I snorted. She wouldn't find out if no one told her. We all watched as Joe flew around the corner, barely missing the wall. We all cheered as he drove around the track and came back to the starting point. He jumped out of his car and walked over to me.

"So where's this picture of Michiru-san?" He asked me. I got out my wallet and showed him the picture. He almost got a nose bleed when he saw it.

"Michiru-san will so not like this." Kamada mumbled. Yuta slapped him on the back.

"Lighten up and join the fun." He told him. Kamada sighed.

"Fine, I will." He turned to me with an evil grin, "Haruka-san, I dare you to get breast implants." I gasped.

"What!" I yelled, "You evil man!" Yuta and Joe were on the ground laughing.

"I want to see you trying to hide all this from Michiru-san now." Kamada laughed. I grumbled.

"Don't worry, I don't think Michiru-san will have any objections when you get home with them." Yuta told me, still laughing. Some how, that did not make me feel better.

An hour later, I was sitting in a white room, my top off and a plastic surgeon sitting in front of me. He was staring at my boobs with a look of concentration on his face. It sort of made me feel uncomfortable.

"Hum, yes I think implants would make a big improvement." He said. Don't they always make a big improvement? Just look at porn stars.

"So, will they be in today?" I asked.

"Oh yes, I can do them right now." He said, "I just have a hard time understanding why a butch lesbian would want breast implants." I was really starting to hate this guy.

"I told you, my friends dared me." I told him, once again. 

"Yes yes! Now follow me to the operating room." He said and got up. I followed him, to my big life change.

It was almost dinner time by the time I arrived home. I felt really different. I had these weights on my chest that weren't there before. I couldn't even hide them under my shirt anymore. It was really obvious I was a girl now. I walked into the house and awaited my family's reaction.

"I'm home!" I called out. Everyone came out to greet me and gasped. Their eyes grew wide and their jaws hit the floor.

"OK, who are you?" Setsuna joked. Ha ha, very funny Setsuna. I looked at Michiru. Her eyes were glued to my chest. I felt like such an object.

"Um, Michiru, my face is up here." I told her. She looked up sheepishly. She coughed slightly.

"Haruka, can we talk about this in our room?" She asked. I nodded and followed her to our room. Once in she closed the door and locked it.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" I asked her.

"What happened there?" She asked.

"We were playing dare at the track today and Kamada-san dared me to get breast implants." I told her.

"Hum, I'm going to have to have a talk with him." Michiru said, "So, can I see them?" God, she can be even more perverted then I am. I looked at her slyly. "Come on! Won't you show your own girlfriend your boobs?" She asked. I sighed.

"I guess I can." I said, "Although I think you were looking at them enough door stairs." She blushed. I slowly started to remove my shirt. Once my shirt and bra were off, I found Michiru's hand on them. She squeezed gently.

"Nice." She said. She gave them a gentle kiss. "Come on. Supper's done." I put my shirt back on and we went down for supper.

The next afternoon, I was in the shopping district with Michiru. We were both having a nice day. Last night was amazing. Setsuna complained to no ends this morning at breakfast about the noise. She always complains though. Michiru entered a shop and I waited outside for her. I spotted a girl and went to flirt with her.

"Hey there, it's a nice day to be shopping, isn't it?" I started. The girl looked me up and down.

"Yeah, I guess it is." She replied. Her phone then went off and she answered it. "Hi! Not much! Some weird girl with big boobs is trying to flirt with me." She told the person on the other end. Damn, I guess straight girls won't mistake me for a guy anymore. I sighed and walked off back to my Michiru, who loves me no matter how big my boobs are.

Later, we entered a restaurant for lunch. We walked around looking for a table and spotted the inners. It looked like they had room for two more at their table. We walked over to them and they turned to us. They spotted me and like my family last night, their eyes went wide and their jaws hit the floor. Usagi was first to speak.

"Haruka-san, is that you?" She asked. I nodded. "What happened?"

"I was playing dare with my friends at the track yesterday and they dared me to get breast implants." I explained once again. They nodded nervously. Finally, Minako spoke.

"Well, it looks like now you finally have more talent the Mako-chan!"

The End!

Sorry for referencing the dub with the last line, but I just couldn't help it. I hope you all found this amusing. I promise the next one shot will star either Setsuna or Hotaru.


	6. The Three Steps to Being Gay

Hi again. I'm glad you all liked the last one shot. As promised, I'm now writing a one shot about Setsuna. This will be from her point of view, which will be interesting since I've never written from her point of view. I never even thought I had much in common with her either. Well enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

The Three Steps to Being Gay

I arrived home one night in complete frustration. I had yet another unsuccessful date that night. All the guy cared about was sex. What the hell? We had just met! How could he be thinking about that already? I sighed as I walked into the house. Haruka and Michiru were busy necking on the couch when I walked in. Why must they always rub it in? I coughed to get their attention. They both blushed when they noticed me.

"Ah, hi Setsuna! How'd your date go?" Michiru asked in embarrassment. Wouldn't you like to know? It looks like your 'date' went better then mine did.

"Terrible. The guy only cared about having sex." I told them.

"Ah, don't we all?" Haruka said. I gave her a cold glare and Michiru lightly smacked her on the arm.

"Be nice to the poor girl." She scolded. She turned to face me. "Oh Setsuna, this is the fifth unsuccessful date this month. You just have no luck with men." Haruka chuckled. What was she thinking now?

"Maybe that's because she doesn't like men." She said. OK, what has she been drinking tonight? I thought she knew better then to just assume everyone is gay.

"I'm not gay." I told her. She only smirked at this.

"Are you sure you're not. You may just be stuck on step one on the three steps to being gay." She told me. What was she talking about now? I had better stuff to deal with.

"And what are the three steps to being gay?" I asked in annoyance.

"Step one: Denial." She said. So I was in denial was I? I'll show her denial! "Step two: Acceptance." She continued. She better accept her fate of having the time staff shoved up her butt if she doesn't get to the point. "Step three: Sex." She finished. Why did everything lead to sex? I swear, all people care about is sex. I sighed in frustration.

"And what is your point?" I asked her.

"That you're in denial, but with mine and Michiru's help, you'll be in step three in no time!" She said happily. God, why did I not like the sounds of this?

The next morning, I woke up and went downstairs for breakfast. Haruka and Michiru were already downstairs. I looked around. Strange. It felt like something was missing. I then realized what it was.

"Where's Hotaru?" I asked.

"She's visiting Chibiusa today." Haruka told me. "I figured what we're doing today to get you to step two wasn't appropriate for her." Huh, step two? Step two of what? I then remembered what happened the previous day. They weren't trying to make me gay, were they?

"And just what exactly are we doing today?" I asked nervously. Haruka just smirked.

"You'll see." She said. I did not have a good feeling about this at all. Maybe I should just hide in the time gate today.

That afternoon, I found myself in a strip club with Haruka and Michiru. All around me naked girls danced around. I stared at my drink, refusing to take my eyes off it. Haruka was busy jumping up and down screaming. Who would have ever thought she would act like this? She glanced at me with disapproval.

"Come on Setsuna, take you're eyes off your drink. You'll never get to step two at this rate." She told me. Why was she doing this again?

"And what if I don't want to get to 'step two'?" I asked her. She sighed.

"Do you want to be one of those people that takes step one to the grave with them?" She asked me. What? Is she talking about straight people? I glanced to the chair beside me.

"Huh, where'd Michiru-san go?" I asked. Haruka and I looked up on stage and saw Michiru dancing with the strippers, shoving money in their G-strings.

"Now why can't you be more like her?" Haruka asked me. Maybe I can't because I'm not a pervert, but then again who would have thought Michiru would be a pervert?

"Hum, maybe we should go somewhere else." Haruka suggested. Please, anywhere but here. Anywhere had to be better then here!

An hour later, we were sitting in a lesbian club. Well, at least the women here were keeping their clothes on. I had yet another drink in front of me. This was my forth one this day. Haruka and Michiru both sat beside me. They had their arms around me and were coaching me for some reason.

"Look at that one, Setsuna-san! She's totally your type." Haruka said.

"Nah, I think that one would be better for her." Michiru pointed to some butch woman. Well, she did look like a guy.

"Yeah, go talk to her, Setsuna-san!" Haruka told me and pushed me over to the butch woman. I bumped into her since Haruka had pushed me so hard. She turned to face me, with interest written all over her face. I was in trouble now.

"Hey there, I'm Kimura. What's your name?" She asked me. Should I tell her? Well, what was the worst that could happen?

"I'm Setsuna." I told her. She smirked at me again. God, she better not be as perverted as that guy I dated last night. She placed her hand on my back.

"Wanna dance?" She asked me. Now she wanted me to dance? Wasn't this going to fast? I glanced over at my friends. They were giving me the 'go for it' face. I sighed and turned back to Kimura.

"I guess." I took another sip of my drink as Kimura led me to the dance floor. She led me in our dance. I had to admit, she was a good dancer. After we had finished dancing she led me back to her table and ordered me another drink. She turned to face me.

"So tell me about your self." She said. Great, what was I supposed to say?

"Well I'm a woman." I said. She chuckled at this for some reason.

"You mean you're not a transvestite?" She laughed hard. Ha ha, very funny. That's almost as bad as that Mamoru is me in drag joke.

"Well I also live with my two lesbian friends and for some reason they think I'm a lesbian and dragged me here." I said. I took another sip.

"Well women are more sexy then men." Kimura wink at me. I chuckled nervously and took some more sips. I hope nothing bad will happen.

The next morning I woke up with a killer headache. What the hell had happened last night? I remember drinking a lot. Damn, I must have a hangover. I couldn't remember a thing. I then noticed I was naked. Why was I naked? I then noticed something beside me. This could not be good. I pulled the covers off to find a naked woman there. I suddenly remembered last night. Damn, I ended up sleeping with that Kimura woman. She slowly started to wake up.

"Morning Sunshine." She said when she said me. How was I going to get out of this? This could not get any worse. Suddenly Haruka and Michiru burst in. I screamed and covered my chest.

"What the hell are you guys doing?" I screamed at them. They looked at me proudly.

"Wow! We just set out to get you to step two and you end up at step three. Congratulations!" Haruka said.

"I can't believe my little girl is finally becoming a woman!" Michiru wailed. God, these two were insane. I got dressed quickly and left the room.

"I'll be gone for the rest of the day." I said and headed off to a long day at the time gate.

The End!

Well I hope you all like my one shot starring Setsuna. My next one shot will star Hotaru. Review please.


	7. Hotaru Becomes a Woman

Thanks for the reviews again. Here's my one shot about Hotaru. I guess I'll write it from her point of view then. Can't wait to see how that will work.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

Hotaru Becomes a Woman

It was a peaceful Saturday morning. When I woke up the first thing I noticed was that I had cramps. Major cramps. I clutched my stomach as I moaned and rolled over. Why did I have cramps? Was I sick? I had become so strong after Mistress 9 had left me. I hope she didn't possess me again. I didn't want to become the strange little weak girl again. I worked my way into the bathroom. I lowered my pajama bottoms and screamed.

"What's going on in here?" Haruka-papa asked as she, Michiru-mama, and Setsuna-mama all burst into the bathroom. God this was embarrassing. Here I was, a dieing child again and I couldn't even use the bathroom in privacy anymore. I looked back down at my pajama bottom and cried a bit.

"I'm dieing." I told them. They all looked confused. "I have cramps and there's blood in my pajama bottoms. I'm going to die!" I burst into tears. I looked at my parents through my tears. Haruka-papa had a shocked look on her face. She looked like she didn't want to deal with this. My two mamas on the other hand looked overjoyed about the situation. Do they hate me that much?

"Oh, my little girl is finally becoming a woman!" Michiru-mama burst out and began to cry. OK, maybe she did have some sympathy for me. But still, what did me dieing have to do with becoming a woman?

"Oh before you know it, we'll be grandparents." Setsuna-mama then said. Huh, was I going to have a baby and die right here? This is confusing.

"She won't be having any soon if I can help it." Haruka-papa said. Good, she'll save me from this horrible fate. Won't she? I can't take this confusion any longer.

"What's wrong with me?" I asked my parents. "Why are you all so happy? I could die from this!" They all looked at me sheepishly.

"Sorry about that, I guess in all the excitement we forgot to tell you what's happening." Michiru-mama said as she approached me. "To make it simple for now, you around going through a period all women go through every month." Great, I would die every month? I didn't like the sounds of that. Setsuna-mama then approached me with a pair of underwear.

"Hotaru, there are two ways women can deal with this. Today we'll teach you the simpler method, a pad." She told me. Michiru-mama went to the sink and pulled a box out of the drawer. She reached into the box and pulled out something wrapped in green plastic.

"This Hotaru, is a pad. We will now teach you how to put it on your underwear." She told me. Huh, why would I want something on my underwear? "You pull on this tab to open it. Then you place the sticky end on the crotch of you underwear like this." She demonstrates to me. She then hands me my underwear to put on.

"You'll need to change it when it filled with blood." Setsuna-mama told me. So, was this a bandage of some sort? Would it stop the bleeding and save me?

"So why don't you get dressed and come downstairs so I can explain this to you with the help of your Setsuna-mama and Haruka-papa." Michiru-mama says.

"You leave me out of this." Haruka-papa said. "I'm going for a drive." With that she left. I knew she didn't want to deal with it. I hope I'll be OK.

Once I was downstairs, Michiru-mama placed me at the table with her and Setsuna-mama. This sort of made me feel uncomfortable the way they were looking at me. They still looked too happy about this.

"OK, so Hotaru, welcome to puberty. This is the time of you life when you transition from being a little girl into a woman." Michiru-mama told me.

"And how do I become a woman?" I asked. Did I have to pass a test? I hope I don't since I never studied for one.

"You're body does the work. Everyone is programed when they are born to start the transition to adulthood at a certain age when they are born." Setsuna-mama told me, "For girls, it starts with breast development." I looked down at my chest that was starting to grow. "Another change is in the voice. You'll also start to grow hair on other parts of you're body besides your head." She continued. No, I didn't want to turn into a monkey.

"And the biggest part of becoming a woman is monthly menstruation." Michiru-mama finished. "But when you first start, it takes awhile for it to become monthly." So I had time to stop this before I did die?

"But why am I bleeding?" I asked. Maybe if I know why I'm bleeding I can stop it. I hope I can stop it.

"Hotaru, have you ever wondered where babies come from?" Setsuna-mama asked me. What did babies have to do with this?

"Don't they come out of women's bellies?" I replied. I thought everyone knew that.

"But do you know how they get there?" Michiru-mama asked me. OK, that I didn't know. I used to think they just magically appeared there. I shook my head no.

"Well, you see, once a girl reaches a certain age, she is able to have babies. To have a baby, the girl must be in a special relationship with a man. If she is not, all the blood and stuff that gathers in her uterus must be disposed of so the process can start again. So the blood coming out of you right now is what was gathered in your uterus." Setsuna-mama explained. I was still confused. Did I need to be with a man to live? But Michiru-mama was with Haruka-papa and she wasn't a man.

"Michiru-mama, do you bleed every month." I asked. Maybe there's a way for me to live with out being with a man.

"Yes, I do." She replied. Now to discover her secret.

"But you're not with a man. How can you still be alive? Why haven't you died of blood loss yet?" I asked. They both started to laugh at this.

"Hotaru, you're body does not need this blood to live." Michiru-mama told me. So I wouldn't die then? That was a relief.

"One more question, how long does the bleeding last?" I asked.

"Each month, it usually lasts for 5-7 days." Setsuna-mama told me. OK, how can I bleed for days and not die? This made no sense. I got up from the table to leave.

"Wait, don't you want to know more?" Michiru-mama asked me.

"No, I find this all to be disturbing." I said as I went to my room. I wish I could be reborn again so I wouldn't have to deal with this.

"I can't believe our little girl is finally a woman." Michiru-mama cried from the living room.

The End!

Well, sorry I made you sit through a sex ed lesson. I don't even know why I wrote about this. I find my opinion of puberty is more like Haruka's was in this. If I ever did have a daughter some day by miracle, I would not be the one to explain this to her. I didn't even want to hear about this when I started. I didn't even care. I still don't. I just call it a monthly bother. Well review.


	8. Michiru's Ex

Hi, I'm so sorry that it's been so long. I had trouble thinking of my next idea. Well I did post some videos on youtube during the time. My user name there is Tache101 if you're interested. Well enjoy this.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

Michiru's Ex

I was sitting in Haruka's car as we zoomed towards the Crown. The inners had invited us outers to their senshi meeting this week. It was so nice of them to invite us, they usually didn't. Oh well. We arrived and climbed out of the car. The inners were already there. They waved us over to their table and we sat down.

"So, what's this meeting about?" Haruka asked them once we sat down. I was wondering that too. I hope their isn't a new enemy.

"Just senshi stuff. Nothing big and exciting." Usagi told her.

"Then why did you invite us?" Haruka asked.

"I hoped inviting you would make it more exciting." Usagi replied. So she thought we were exciting. I thought they would think our lives were boring compared to theirs. Apparently not. I sighed and looked around. I spotted someone I hadn't seen in a long time, Megumi, my ex-girlfriend. Megumi was a fairly tall girl. She sort of looked like Haruka, except she has brown eyes and medium length blonde hair that was pulled back into a boyish ponytail. To the untrained eye, she would appear to be a handsome young man. I glanced at the inners. I wonder if they learned anything from when they met Haruka. Well, if they didn't, I could have some entertainment. I looked back over to Megumi, who had just noticed me and started to walk over. Perfect.

"Hi there, Michiru-san, long time no see." She said as she approached our table. The inners looked up at her and their eyes literally turned into hearts. Seems they haven't learned anything yet. This would be fun. I stood up to introduce her to everyone else.

"Everyone, this is Megumi, my ex." I told them, "We used to date in middle school."

"Nice to meet you, Megumi-san." The inners said with drool coming from their mouths.

"Megumi, this is Usagi, Minako, Makoto, Rei, and Ami." I introduced her to the inners.

"Nice to meet you girls." She told them.

"Are you single?" Minako asked. I chuckled slightly at her. I could be so cruel when I wanted to be. I turned to my family.

"And over here we have my girlfriend, Haruka, our adopted daughter, Hotaru, and our best friend, Setsuna." I finished. Megumi walked up to Haruka and shook hands with her.

"So you're the lucky woman who ended up with Michiru-san. Congratulations, though I have to say I'm a bit jealous." She said. Haruka just smirked triumphantly while I giggled. The inners looked confused though.

"So, Michiru-san has always been a bisexual?" Usagi asked confused. "Did she date girls while she was with you?" Wow, Usagi's making me out to be some sort of player. I shot a confused Megumi a 'play along' look. She obviously got the message.

"Oh yeah, she's always been one to chase after boyish looking girls." Megumi said with a smirk. Well I guess that was true. The inners all nodded slightly. Usagi then smirked to herself.

"He's mine!" She muttered.

"But you already have Mamoru-san!" Minako and Rei shot back at her.

"Sure, Mamo-chan is great, but there's just something hot about these feminine looking men." She said. I laughed at this. If only she knew. I turned to the other outers and saw them laughing as well. It seems they are aware of Megumi's true gender. This should be fun.

I was sitting in the living with the rest of my family that night. They all seemed to be amused by the inners lack of brains or maybe lack of eyes is a better term. Haruka turned to me in a more serious matter.

"So, what exactly did you do with Megumi?" She asked me. Looks like jealous Haruka had made her entrance.

"Are you jealous?" I asked her slyly. She blushed at this. "Well, all we did was date and kiss a bit. I was still a virgin the first time we…" I was cut off by Haruka's cough.

"OK, OK! Enough with that." She said embarrassed. Setsuna decided to interrupt the awkward situation.

"So, how should we reveal Megumi's true gender to them?" She asked. We all sat there thinking for a bit.

"Well, how did they find out Haruka-papa was a girl?" Hotaru asked.

"They saw her without her jacket on. It was pretty obvious she was a girl without it, she you could tell she had breasts." I told her.

"Hum, maybe we should go to the beach tomorrow after our shopping trip." Setsuna suggested.

"Great, but Megumi doesn't swim. She's like Haruka and just watches on the side." I told Setsuna.

"Well the inners will probably force her to remove her shirt anyways." Haruka pointed out. We all nodded. It was decided. Tomorrow, we would go to the beach.

The next day, we met the inners and Megumi at the Crown to begin our fun filled day. The inners were all excited of the thought of spending the entire day with a cute 'guy'. I can't wait to see their faces when they find out the truth. I smiled as we walked over to them.

"Hi, everyone!" I greeted, "Who wants to go to the beach this afternoon?" I asked. The inners all squealed. Seems they liked the idea. Either that or they were picturing what they thought Megumi would look like in a Speedo.

"Well let's go shopping and then hit the beach!" Setsuna said. With that, we were off to start our day.

At the store, the inners were all busy picking out bikinis. I wonder why they were going for bikinis over one-pieces. I found one-pieces were easier to swim in. I guess they wanted to show off their bodies to Megumi. I sighed. I looked around and noticed Minako was missing. Where did she go? I looked around and finally found her looking in the men's section at the Speedos. I giggled and pointed this out to Megumi.

"Oh no, I'm not wearing those." She said, "In fact, I'm not even going swimming." I giggled some more. She could be so cute sometimes.

"I know you're not, but you could tease them a bit before dropping the bomb on them." I told her. She turned to me with a smirk.

"You can be so evil, Michiru-san." She told me.

"I know." I replied. We chuckled evilly to ourselves, which caused several shoppers to stare at us.

At last, we were finally on the beach. Now to drop the bomb on the inners. The only question is how. I looked behind me to find all the inners flocking around Megumi. I gave her an 'it's time' look. She smiled and nodded at me.

"So, who wants me to take off my shirt?" Megumi asked. All the inners squealed in delight. This was going to be great. I watched eagerly as Megumi slowly started to unbutton her shirt to reveal her sports bra to the inners. The inners gasped, their eyes grew wide, their jaws hit the ground, and they screamed.

"No way!" Minako screamed.

"It's a girl!" Makoto screamed.

"Isn't it?" Rei added. They sounded like they had just watched a child's birth. Ami was busy trying not to blush. Usagi on the other hand was trying to pretend to be smart.

"I knew he was a girl all along." She said. Sure she did. Haruka walked up behind me laughing.

"Well that was fun." She said in between laughs. I turned to her still laughing.

"It sure was." I said, "So do you have any ex-girlfriends to introduce them to?"

"None that will produce this result." She replied.

The end!

Well I hope you liked this. Hopefully it won't take so long for me to write another one shot. Review!


	9. What a Birthday Present! Haruka Becomes

Well sorry it took so long again. This one shot will not only be Michiru's birthday story, but it's also going to be a parody. The other day I found doujinshi scans of a Detective Conen parody where Haruka got turned into a kid. I liked it but found it too short. So I decided to write my own Detective Conen parody. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon or Detective Conen.

What a Birthday Present! Haruka Becomes a Six Year Old!

It was my beloved Michiru's birthday today. She'd be turning 18. Where did the time go? Right now I was out looking for the perfect birthday present. I looked long and hard, but couldn't find anything as perfect as my Michiru. Finally, I entered a shady looking store to find her present.

"Excuse me," I said as I walked up to the men in black that ran the store, "it's my girlfriend's birthday today and I'm trying to find her a present. Would you guys have anything I could give her?" Both men smirked evilly. What had I gotten myself into?

"Yes, we have the perfect present?" One man said as he whipped out a small bottle. "What kind of girl wouldn't want her boyfriend to stay young and cute forever?" I blinked confused by his words. I decided not to correct my gender.

"Um, what is that?" I asked him and pointed at the small bottle he held.

"That my boy," The other man said, "is a new drug we made. If you mix it with water, you'll stay young and cute forever." I blinked. I could stay young and cute forever? At age 60, I could still be attracting cute young girls. I drooled at the thought.

"I'll take it!" I yelled as I slapped money on the counter. Both men smirk evil as I ran off. I hope Michiru likes her present.

When I finally got home I went into the kitchen. I got a glass and filled it with water. The directions on the bottle said to mix it with water, so I poured it in the glass. With that, I drank it. I felt funny after drinking it. My head began to spin and everything suddenly became bigger, including my clothes.

"What the!" I cried out in a squeaky high pitched voice that was not mine. What had happened to me? Why had I become small? I started to cry as Setsuna and Hotaru walked into the room. Setsuna took one look at me and whipped out a pair of boy's clothes.

"Here, put these on." She told me. I did and she said and put them on.

"Setsuna, why were you carrying these around?" I asked her as I got dressed.

"Because I knew we'd be needing them. I am the Guardian of Time you know." She told me. Figured she knew this would happen.

"Why didn't you warn me this would happen then?" I asked in rather annoyed at the whole situation. What would Michiru think when she saw me now? I knew those men in black looked suspicious!

"Haruka, you know that's taboo. If I had told you, I would have had to face the consequences." She told me. Great, so know I have to suffer because she was too scared to break taboo. How could this get any worse?

"I'm home!" Michiru called from the door. "Do you all have presents for me?" Damn, what am I supposed to tell her about this? She walked into the kitchen and looked around.

"Huh, where's Haruka?" She then looked at me, "And who's that kid?" I'm in big trouble now. Luckily, Setsuna decided to be nice to me after letting this happen.

"Haruka's at a big race. It may be awhile before she gets back. This kid is yours and Haruka's daughter from the future." Setsuna told her. Michiru looked at me confused.

"I have a daughter in the future? How did it happen?" She asked. I hope Setsuna has an explanation for that.

"Science has taken humanity to great lengths." Setsuna told her. Michiru looks confused for a bit before smiling. She bent down and grabbed me in a big hug.

"How cute!" She cried, "She looks just like a young Haruka!" Well hopefully she won't discover the truth soon. I then blushed when I realized as close she had me pressed against her breasts. I know I've been here before, but like this it was a whole different experience. Michiru looked at me funny when she pulled me away.

"What's wrong with her?" She asked.

"Nothing much, she's just a lot like her father." Setsuna told her. Really, you think so? Do you even know my dad, Setsuna?

"I hope this means she won't go racing off somewhere on my birthday." Michiru said angrily. Why did I have the feeling I would be in trouble when I returned to normal? Michiru sighed and bent down to eye level with me. She smiled as she asked, "So, what's your name, little one?" I panicked as I tried to think up a fake name.

"I'm..." I paused and looked around. I looked over to Hotaru who was watching Sera Myu in the living room. I then thought of a good name. "I'm Nao!" I told her. I really had no idea what we would name our kid in the future. I just hope she didn't catch on to this.

"Figures Haruka would name her kid after her favorite Myu actor." Michiru said. Setsuna then picked me up.

"Will you excuse me while I talk to Nao upstairs?" Setsuna asked. Michiru shook her head and Setsuna took me upstairs. "You're birthday presents are in the living room!" Setsuna called back to her.

Once we were in Setsuna's room, I got tossed on the bed and the door was locked. Setsuna then turned to face me.

"So Haruka, where exactly did you buy that stuff that turned you into a 6 year old?" She asked me. Why was she asking me this?

"Huh, I thought you were the Guardian of Time? Shouldn't you already know where it is?" I asked her.

"Of coarse I know where it is. I'm just asking you so I don't break taboo." She told me. Was everything taboo these days? Did that mean it was taboo to go to the bathroom? I sighed and told her where the shop was.

"Great, I'm going to grab Hotaru now and we can force the antidote from them." She laughed evilly. What a mad woman.

"Isn't that some sort of taboo?" I asked.

"It isn't if Saturn does it." Seems there's a way around everything these days. If I stopped time, would that not be taboo and I could get away with it? That'd be sweet.

Later, I was sitting in my room with Michiru while Setsuna and Hotaru were out getting the antidote for me. Michiru was showing me all her birthday presents. I was starting to feel bad I didn't get her anything now. Why oh why did I fall for those evil men's trick? Michiru was giggling when she showed me her next gift.

"You won't believe what Setsuna made me!" She said and she held up some lacy lingerie. I could then feel a bit of blood trickling out my nose.

"That's nice." I commented.

"Do you want me to try it on?" She asked. I nodded as more blood flowed out my nose. She giggled at me as she began to change right in the room. Everything went black as I passed out from a massive nose bleed.

When I woke up, I was in the bath tub with Michiru. It's amazing I didn't pass out again. She had me pressed right against her breasts. I was in heaven. She then looked down at me.

"Oh, you're awake finally. You were covered in blood, so I had to wash you off." She said. "I hope that doesn't bother you." No, it doesn't bother me at all. Just then Setsuna burst through the door.

"Sorry to bother you, Michiru, but it's time for Nao to go home. Haruka called and said she'd be home soon though." She said as she lifted me out of the tub and took me into her room. She pulled out a small bottle and a glass of water. She poured the bottle in the glass.

"Is that the antidote?" I asked her. She nodded.

"Drink this and you'll be back to normal." She told me. I took the glass and drank it. I felt funny again. My head spun as everything became smaller. When it stopped I was myself again. I jumped and cheered.

"Um, Haruka, can you put some clothes on?" Setsuna asked me. I laughed at her.

"What's wrong Setsuna, don't like what you see?" I asked her in a teasing voice. I loved to tease her.

"You know I'm straight." She told me.

"You sure?" I asked. She glared at me and I laughed. "Well I guess it's time for me to go give Michiru her present. I hope she likes it." I dashed out of Setsuna's room, still naked, to give Michiru her present.

"You two better not be too loud tonight!" Setsuna called out.

The End!

Well I hope you liked this. This was so funny, I just may right another parody in the future. Review please!


	10. The Great Threat

Well I finally decided on my next one shot. I decided on another continuation of my

other stories. I hope you like this.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

The Great Threat

It was a lovely day at the park. That is where I had token my family for a fun filled day. My beautiful wife, Michiru, sat beside me with her head on my shoulder. Our best friend, Setsuna, sat beside us reading a book. Figures she'd be to busy reading to have fun. Our daughter, Naoyu, ran through the fields with our adopted daughter, Hotaru, following close behind. Yes Naoyu really was my daughter. She was fast as hell. Hotaru seemed too had recovered well from her illnesses she had before being reborn. With a little practice, she could run like the wind.

It was a perfect peaceful day. Nothing could possibly go wrong. Or at least that is what I thought. The peace was suddenly interrupted as something fell from the sky, landing in a near by lake. I was quickly up, along with Michiru and Setsuna, beside the lake. Naoyu and Hotaru had wandered over as well. I stood protectively in front of my girls. I would not let anything happen to them.

"What is it papa?" Naoyu asked me, "What fell from the sky?"

"I don't know, Naoyu." I told her. I didn't take my eyes off the lake as the water rose and shot up. I braced myself as a shadow became visible through the water. Why did this all seem familiar? I gasped when I finally saw who it was.

"King Poseidon, what are you doing here?" Setsuna asked him when the water had cleared. Great, had he gone bad again and was here to take Michiru away from me again? If that was the case, I was ready to fight him.

"It's terrible!" He said as he walked onto land beside us.

"What's terrible?" I asked him. I still stood in front of my two girls. I still did not trust this guy fully after what he did to my Michiru.

"It was horrible?" He said.

"What was?" Michiru asked. "You can tell us what happened." Poseidon stuttered some more.

"I was defeated in battle by an outside threat." He finally said. We all gasped at this. What could have defeated him? It took everything out of me just to turn him good. "I didn't stand a chance. Now it's heading for earth." Great, we had to fight something that beat him. Did we even stand a chance?

"What should we do?" Michiru asked him. "How long do we have?" Yes, I sure hope it doesn't arrive now.

"I think we have about a week. I came straight here after I was defeated at light speed. This threat is going to terrorize the other planets before coming here. If you all train hard enough, just maybe…" He told us. Damn, this thing was attacking the other planets as well. I hope Queen Miranda will be alright.

"How bad was the damage to Neptune?" Michiru asked him. She seemed concerned about her home planet. I don't really blame her. I can't stop worry about my planet, Uranus.

"It was pretty bad. Large areas were obviated. The palace was torn apart. Luckily most of the people survived. The merpeople are helping them rebuild by bringing in supplies from undamaged parts of the planet." He explained. That sounded bad. What would this mean for the other planets? Did we even stand a chance? Well now wasn't the time to worry about that.

"Come on. We better tell the inners about this and start training." I said. Everyone nodded and we left the park to begin training for this great threat.

During the next week we had all trained harder then we even had before. Come to think of it, we never really trained before since we were never given any warning before an attack. This was all new to us. We had all decided to head up to the mountains where Makoto's old karate instructor, Kakusui, had trained her. It was a nice place, and far away from civilization so no innocent people would get in the way. Kakusui was even nice enough to provide us with lodging and food for the week. Though Usagi did complain about sleeping on the floor and the food. Oh well.

We trained in the forest, where Kakusui wouldn't see us. We sparred with each other, practiced our attacks on trees, exercised, but most importantly we improved ourselves. We were going to be as prepared as we could for the attack. Poseidon watched over our training and gave us advice. Queen Miranda did too. She arrived a few days into training after being defeated by the threat. She told me Uranus did take a lot of damage, but would make it. All the senshi were worried about there planets, well except for Minako and Ami. Minako kept saying the threat would have to go through her first.

The last night, before the treat was scheduled to arrive, we all slept nervously. Naoyu curled up to me tightly since she had to come with us. We couldn't just leave her at home alone. Plus no matter how young she was, she was still a senshi.

"Papa, what's going to happen tomorrow?" She asked me.

"I don't know dear. Just try to get some sleep." I told her. Michiru rolled over to cuddle with her family.

"Don't worry, Naoyu, we won't let anything happen to you." She told her. She gave Naoyu and me a kiss before going to sleep.

The next morning, we all stood ready and transformed in a near by field. We were all nervous about how this would go.

"Are you sure this is where it will land?" Minako asked Poseidon.

"Yup, it will sense you all out. It really doesn't matter where you are." He told her. She gulped. Great, we were being hunted down by one of the most powerful things ever. Suddenly the sky grew black.

"It's here." Poseidon told us. We all gaped at the thing. I couldn't even tell what it was. It looked like something from a nightmare. How could we possibly beat it? No amount of training could prepare us for it. There's no hope! We're all doomed! Naoyu stepped up from behind me.

"Papa, what's that thing?" She asked me.

"What we all feared." I told her. I already felt like I had failed her. There was no way I could protect her from this thing. I was a horrible father.

"It looks funny." Naoyu commented. She stepped forwards. "But still I can't let this thing scare my papa and mama." She raised her fist. "Chibi World Shaking!" She screamed as she released her attack. The attack hit the thing head on. There was a blinding light. I jumped on top of Naoyu to cover her. Were the light cleared the threat was gone.

"Um, what just happened?" Makoto asked.

"It appears my granddaughter beat that thing on her own!" Poseidon said excitedly. "I'm so proud." I gaped at what had happened. What had just happened anyways? I turned to Poseidon.

"Hey, are you sure that thing was powerful?" I asked.

"Of course, it defeated me, didn't it?" He told me. I sighed.

"Are you sure you're just not growing weak, old man?" I asked him. I wasn't in the mood for this. I can't believe I wasted that last week.

"Old man?!?! How many times do I have to tell you my name is King Poseidon?" He screamed at me. I yawned.

"What ever." I said. I turned to my family. "Let's go home."

The End!

Well another one shot is done. I hope you liked it. I was thinking of maybe making a doujinshi for my series, starting with Haruka's Parents. I haven't decided yet though. Please review.


	11. Haruka Becomes a Princess

Guess what? I had no writer's block this time. Yeah! This story is based on one of my favorite episodes of Ranma ½. Although this story is going to be about Haruka, I decided to use Michiru's POV since Haruka is not going to be herself in this.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

Haruka Becomes a Princess 

We were fighting a huge youma today. It just appeared out of nowhere. I was planning on having a nice romantic evening with my girlfriend, but no. This thing just had to ruin that. So here we were, all the senshi, wasting our time fighting yet again. And it wasn't going down easy either. We had already been fighting it for an hour. Uranus was clearly getting annoyed. She stepped forward to face the youma one on one. She glared at the youma and it glared back at her. She raised her fist.

"World Shaking!" She screamed as she launched her attack. The youma shot a beam in response. The two attacks collided in the air. As a result, power beams shot all over the place. They crashed into building causing debris to rain from the sky. 

"Get down!" I cried to the others. Luckily for us, Saturn decided to help out.

"Silent Wall!" She cried and put up a barrier around us. Unfortunately, Uranus was too far away to be protected. I watched at a medium size piece of stone clonked her on the head.

"Uranus!" I cried out in fear. As soon as the coast was clear, I ran to her side. "Oh Haruka, please be OK." I prayed. Luckily, there was no blood coming from her head. I cradled her head in my lap, crying. I didn't want to lose her. Setsuna bend down beside me. 

"Let's take her home to rest." She said. I nodded. That was a good idea. With Jupiter's help, we managed to pick her up and carry her over to the car. 

When we got home, we placed Haruka, who had detransformed, on the couch. I ran to the kitchen and grabbed a cool cloth for her forehead. I placed it on her head and kneeled down beside her. I few minutes later, she woke up. She rubbed her head.

"Ow, my head." She muttered. I noticed that she had used 'atashi' instead of 'boku'. (Just pretend they're speaking Japanese.) 

"Haruka-san, are you OK?" Usagi asked her at once.

"Yeah, I think I'm OK, Usagi-chan." She replied. What was going on here? She had used 'atashi' again, called Usagi 'Usagi-chan' and not 'Kitten' or "Odango', and she was speaking with a more feminine tone then usually. I was worried now. 

"What happened to you Haruka?" I asked her worriedly. 

"I don't know, Michiru-san." She told me. Ack, now she was calling me 'Michiru-san'! Why had she used that 'san'? The rest of the senshi were beginning to notice Haruka's odd behavior. 

"That bump on the head must have caused brain damage of some sort." Ami concluded. 

"Is it some form of amnesia?" Makoto asked. That would explain a lot. 

"It could be." Ami replied. Oh God, my poor little baby could have amnesia. What if she never remembered who she was? I turned back to her. She had just now looked down at her clothes and screamed.

"Why am I wearing this!" She cried out. I looked at her clothes. They were the same men's clothes she always wore. 

"What's wrong with you're clothes?" Usagi asked her. Haruka was having a panic attack.

"Why aren't I wearing a dress or some other pretty clothes?" She asked us. We all shrugged, unsure of what to do. Haruka shot right of the couch and headed upstairs. "Setsuna-san, I'm going to borrow some of your clothes, and then we're going shopping." Haruka hated shopping, unless it was for car parts. What had happened to her? The inners snuck out the door.

"I'm going to investigate her weird behavior." Ami called out before leaving. 

An hour later we arrived at the mall. Haruka was wearing something I never knew Setsuna had. She was wearing pink overalls with bunnies on them and a yellow t-shirt. It looked more like something Usagi would wear. I glanced at Setsuna, who shot a 'don't ask or I'll send you back to before dinosaurs became extinct' at me. I sighed and looked at Haruka's face. She was wearing some of my make-up. She never wears make-up. I did have to admit she looked pretty with lipstick and mascara on. She gasped as we entered a clothing store.

"Oh my, I've never seen so many pretty clothes before." She ran over to a display and held up a pink bra. "Isn't this adorable? I would just look so sexy wearing this!" I couldn't stop the nose bleed at the mental image of her wearing that pink bra.

"Michiru-san, now isn't the time for perverted thoughts." Setsuna whispered at me. I nodded and whipped the blood away. I looked back at Haruka, who had ran over to a dress display. 

"Wow! This dress is fit for a princess!" She commented on a light pink dress with dark pink ribbons, "I want it!" She turned back to me, Setsuna, and Hotaru with a puppy dog look in her eyes. I sighed.

"Go try it on." I told her. She happily grabbed the dress and ran into the fitting rooms. A few minutes later, she emerged wearing the dress. 

"Oh how do I look?" She asked as she spun around, showing of the dress. As weird as it was seeing her in a dress, I had to admit it looked rather good. It showed off a lot, like her sexy legs, bare back, and cleavage. I barely stopped another nose bleed. 

"Um, Haruka, where did you get a normal bra from?" Setsuna asked her. I looked up at her. She never wore anything but sport bras. And I defiantly did not see and sport bras sticking out in that dress.

"Oh, I borrowed one of yours." She told Setsuna. Setsuna looked ready to protest, but I stopped her.

"We'll just buy her new bras here." I whispered. 

"Haruka-papa sure is acting funny." Hotaru commented. I couldn't agree more. 

After buying Haruka a year's supply of girly clothes, we were finally on our way. Haruka was bouncing around all happy about her new clothes. Setsuna turned to talk to me.

"Aren't you concerned about her strange behavior?" She asked me.

"Sort of, but you have to admit, she is a bit cute like this. I could get rather used to her wearing such revealing clothing." I told her. More blood trickled from my nose. 

"That is if you don't die of a nose bleed." Setsuna told me and sighed. I whipped the blood away. 

"Really Setsuna, no one has ever died from a nose bleed before. I'll be fine." I told her. "I'm sure we can all get used to the new Haruka." I then turned around to look at Haruka. She had stopped walking and was now staring of to the right. She had stars in her eyes.

"Wow, look at that guy!" She said. "He's so dreamy. I want to marry him. He'd make the perfect prince." A vein popped in my head. I screamed. 

"That's it! Tonight I'm setting her straight… er gay!" I yelled out. Random people walking by stared at me strangely. 

That night, Haruka sat in the living room with Setsuna, chatting about girly crap. Hotaru was already in bed, which was a good thing. I was in my room, putting on the sexiest lingerie I owned. It was black with red laces. If this didn't set Haruka straight, er gay, then I didn't know what would. I walked out of my room, downstairs, and into the living room. I swayed my hips seductively and moved my hands over my body. 

"Haruka, baby, ready for bed?" I asked her in the sexiest voice I had. Setsuna coughed into her fist and blushed. Haruka looked at me excitedly. Yes, it was working.

"Wow, Michiru-san, where did you buy that lingerie?" She asked me. "If I wore that for the man of my dreams, I've been having children in no time!" More veins popped in my head. I screamed so loudly, I swear some windows broke. I grabbed a lamp of the table and swung it violently at Haruka. 

"Ah, Michiru-san, what are you doing?" She asked as she dodged my swings. 

"You, stupid, baka!" I screamed and made contact with her head. She fell to the floor. I gasped at what I had done. What if I killed her? She laid there motionless for a few minutes until…

"Ow! What the hell happened to my head, Michiru?" She asked me. She looked at what she was wearing. "And why the hell am I wearing a damn dress?" I gasped. She was swearing, called me 'Michiru', used 'boku', and was speaking in the masculine tone she always used. I jumped on her and gave her a huge hug. 

"You're back to normal!" I cried and tightened the hug. She then noticed what I was wearing.

"Maybe this night isn't so bad after all. Why don't we go to bed now and I can remove this dress?" She told me. I felt another nose bleed coming as I let her up.

"Sounds great to me." I said. With that we went upstairs.

The End!

Well I hoped you loved this one shot. Hope it gave you a laugh. Please review!


	12. The 40 Thousand Year Old Virgin

Sorry it took so long

Sorry it took so long. I finally thought of another good idea. This one shot will be a Setsuna one. Hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

The 40 Thousand Year Old Virgin

It was that time of year again. It was the time of the annual senshi camping trip. I was forced to come by my housemates and Small Lady. Wish I could have stayed home though. This trip has been pretty boring so far. When we got here the first thing we did was set up our tents. Usagi had ended up destroying hers in the process and ended up having to sleep with Rei in her tent. Afterwards we went fishing for supper. To no ones surprise, Usagi ended up falling into the river trying to scoop a fish out. All in all, it was pretty uneventful.

That night we all sat around the campfire roasting marshmallows. That is until Minako pulled out beer bottles. How she got them I'll never know, and that's surprising considering I am the time guardian.

"Minako-chan, where did you get those?" Usagi asked her.

"I snuck them out of the fridge. I hope dad doesn't notice they're gone." She laughed sheepishly. "So who's up to a drinking game?" She asked.

"What kind of drinking game?" Makoto asked.

"I was thinking of 'I Never'." Minako said. Usagi looked confused. "It's a game where we all take turns saying something we never done. If anyone in the circle has done what was said, they have to take a drink."

"Sounds like fun." Usagi said. The beer bottles were quickly passed around. Why did I have a bad feeling about this?

"I'll start!" Minako said. "I never destroyed my tent while setting it up." Usagi took a drink.

"I never fell in the river while catching fish." Rei said. Usagi took another drink.

"I never… wasted an entire day chasing after Haruka-san." Ami said. Usagi, Minako, Makoto, and Michiru took a drink.

"I never had sex before." Makoto said. Usagi, Haruka, and Michiru took a drink. I gasped at Usagi.

"You're had sex already?!" She nodded. "I knew Haruka and Michiru had since my room is right next to there's, but you?!"

"What about you Setsuna-san, you didn't take a drink." Minako pointed out. I blushed at this. It seemed my secret was out.

"Well that's because I never have had sex before." I told them. Everyone gasped.

"And how old are you again?" Haruka asked me. She just had to rub it in. I blushed even more.

"I'm 40 thousand." I said. Everyone doubled over.

"You mean in 40 thousand years, you've never had sex before?" Michiru asked me. I nodded.

"Wow, I don't think I'd be able to last that long." Haruka said. This coming from the girl who lost her virginity to some drunk girl when she was 14.

"I can't believe it, a 40 thousand year old virgin. And I thought 40 year old virgin were crazy." Minako said.

"Oh shut up! All of you!" I hollered. I knew this camping trip was a bad idea.

"Wow, sounds like someone needs to get laid." Haruka commented. I smacked her in the back of the head. Minako walked up beside me and put an arm around my shoulder.

"Don't worry, Setsuna-san. With the help of me, the senshi of love, you will soon lose your virginity." She struck a victory pose. Why did I not like the sounds of this?

The camping trip was finally over. At last I was back at home. No more sleeping on the ground in a tent. I was just getting comfortable on the couch when the doorbell rang. Michiru quickly answered it.

"Hello there, Minako-chan!" I heard her say, "What brings you here?" Why did I not like the sounds of this?

"Hello, Michiru-san! Is Setsuna-san home?" Minako asked. This could not be good.

"Yes, she's sitting on the couch in the living room." Within seconds, I had Minako on my lap. She gave me a big hug.

"Are you ready to lose your virginity?" She asked me. I knew this was bad. What on Earth was she planning?

"Um, no." I squeaked. Honestly, what was wrong with being a virgin? Minako laughed at me.

"Of coarse you're ready! Who wouldn't be ready after 40 thousand years?" Why was she putting words into my mouth? She grabbed my arm and dragged me off the couch. "We're going guy hunting!" She paused and turned to me, "Or do you prefer girls?" I stared at her blankly.

"How would I know?" I screamed.

"Don't you know your own preferences?" She asked me.

"Well I know I prefer bacon over sausage." I told her. A large sweat drop rolled down her head.

"I meant your sexual preferences." She said.

"Well I never had sex before or even thought about it." I told her.

"You're worse then I thought." She said. She pulled harder on my arm. "Come on, we'll get you laid if it's the last thing we do."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" I cried as I was dragged out the door.

"Bye, have fun!" Haruka called.

"Have her home by midnight!" Michiru called. They weren't helping.

An hour later, we arrived at a club. The bouncer let us in right away, much to my displeasure. The music was very loud inside the club. People were dancing like crazy on the floor, grinding with drinks in hand. This place was hell. I clung to Minako's arm as she walked around the club. She had a big stupid grin on her face the entire time.

"The great thing about this club is that not only are there a lot of guys, there are also a lot of bisexual girls. You can experiment tonight to discover your preferences." She said.

"And what if I don't want to discover my preferences?" I asked. She bonked me on the head and pushed me in the direction of some random guy. The guy turned to face me and smiled. Now I was scared.

"Why hello there, babe." He said as he put an arm around my shoulder.

"Hi!" I squeaked. He chuckled at my reaction.

"What's wrong, babe, never been with a man?" I nodded. "So you're an experimenting lesbian?" I shook my head. "You're a virgin?" I nodded. He chuckled some more. "Well I'm just going to have to be extra gentle with you." I was as stiff as I could possibly be. "Hey, Tamara, I got a virgin over here." A young butch looking women with short black hair came over.

"Hi!" I squeaked once again.

"This is my lesbian friend, Tamara." The man said, "I'm Daisuke by the way."

"I'm Setsuna." I squeaked. I shot my hand out robotically so they could shake it. I really had no idea what to do. They both laughed at me.

"You found quite the funny one." Tamara commented.

"Indeed I did." Daisuke said. "So how about we all have some fun." I did not like the sounds of this.

I woke up the next morning with a pounding headache. I felt like I was missing something. I looked to my left to find a man. I looked at my right to find a woman. There was no way this could be good. Just then the entire senshi team burst into the room. Confetti fell from the ceiling, party noise makers popped, and a large sign with 'Congratulations!' on it fell from the ceiling.

"Congratulations on losing you're virginity, Setsuna-san!" The senshi yelled. Oh great, now I was in trouble. Chibiusa started to cry.

"I can't believe Puu is finally becoming a woman." She cried.

"I know, it's hard to believe." Haruka said. Veins popped in my head. I whipped the time staff out and started blasting at everyone.

"All of you, out!" I screamed. Everyone scrambled from my room, including Daisuke and Tamara.

"And so ends the tale of the 40 thousand year old virgin!" I heard Usagi say. I promptly sent a blast in her direct. Looks like I better spent a long few months at the time gates.

The End!

Well I hope you liked this one. I know it may be similar to my last Setsuna one, but it's still great, right?


	13. The Outers get a Cat

Everyone, I have some big news before the start of this one shot

Everyone, I have some big news before the start of this one shot. There is a new drama series out in Japan and you will not believe this. The main characters in this new series are named Michiru and Ruka, and that is only the beginning. Ruka is a bit boyish and she races in motocross. On top of that, it also appears that she may have a crush or something on Michiru. For anyone interested, the series is called "Last Friends" and the first episode is available subbed from Kioku Fansubs. Well now that I told you about that, on with the one shot.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

The Outers get a Cat

I was sitting on the couch with my Michiru. She was cuddled up to me, resting her head on my shoulder. I had my arm wrapped around her. Setsuna was sitting in a separate chair, reading her book. Michiru and I were busy watching the new drama series "Last Friends". I swear they based this off our lives, only leaving the senshi part out. We were watching it in peace that is before Hotaru ran in.

"Haruka-papa! Michiru-mama! Setsuna-mama! Can we get a cat?" She called out as she ran in, jumping in mine and Michiru's laps. I patted her on the head.

"I don't know, Hime-chan, a cat is a huge responsibility." I told her. She looked at me with puppy dog eyes. Damn Michiru for teaching her that. I turn to Michiru.

"What do you say?" I asked her.

"Well I don't really want fur left all over my furniture." She said.

"I'll brush it everyday!" Hotaru pleads. We then turned to Setsuna.

"I don't really mind, as long as it stays out of my room." She said. Hotaru cheered with joy.

"We're getting a cat! "We're getting a cat!" She jumped up and down and ran out of the room to call Chibiusa. I just sighed. What were we getting ourselves into?

That afternoon, we went to the pet store to buy a cat. We looked all around the store. There was a wide assortment of pets everything from dogs to cats to birds to hamsters to lizards to snakes to fish. They were all here. Hotaru was eyeing one of the hamsters.

"Kawaii!" She squealed, "Can we get a hamster as well?" I sighed. Buying a hamster would be like buying really expensive cat food.

"No, we better not, cats and hamsters don't mix." Michiru told her.

"Why not?" Hotaru asked with a sad look in her eyes.

"Well you do know how cats have a tendency to kill mice right?" Setsuna said. Hotaru nodded. "Well they also have a tendency to kill other small rodents. Who wouldn't want that, would you?" Hotaru shook her head. With that we walked over to the cat cage. There were six cats in there today. Hotaru picked up an orange cat.

"Kawaii!" She squealed, "Let's get this one." We took the cat, food, litter box, collar, toys, and anything else related to raising cats up front to pay.

That night, we were all in the living room with our new cat Hotaru had named Tora. The inners and their cats were over as well, since Hotaru wanted to show Tora off. Tora was busy checking everyone out. Usagi squealed like a fool.

"OMG! He's so cute!" She squealed. We all sweat dropped. Tora walked over to her and started to rub his head against her leg. Just then there was a noise outside. We all rushed to the door to see what it was. There was a youma in our backyard. How it got there, I'll never know. We quickly transformed and confronted it.

"Stop right there!" Sailor Moon cried. The youma faced her with little interest. "How dare you interrupt a gathering of friends celebrating a new cat? For that I will not forgive you! I'm Sailor Moon!"

"Sailor Chibimoon!"

"Sailor Mercury!"

"Sailor Mars!"

"Sailor Venus!"

"Sailor Jupiter!"

"In the name of the moon, we will punish you!" Leave it to the inners to create a scene. I for one did not feel like introducing myself to a random youma so decided just to attack.

"World Shaking!" I cried. The other outers followed my lead.

"Deep Submerge!"

"Dead Scream!" All our attacks hit the thing head on. Sailor Moon cheered and I noticed Tora had wondered out onto the battle field.

"That's the way to do it!" Sailor Moon cried. Unaware of Tora's presence, she attacked. "Moon Spiral Heart Attack!" She cried.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" I cried as the attack hit Tora instead of the Youma. There was a blinding flash of light.

"TORA!" Saturn cried.

"Way to go, Usagi." Mars commented dully. Sailor Moon looked shocked.

"I didn't mean to…" She looked ready to cry. When the light finally died down, Tora was still there. The only difference was that now he had a crescent moon on his forehead. He walked over to Saturn.

"Don't cry Hotaru, I'm still alright." He said. Saturn looked shocked.

"You can talk?" She was very shocked.

"Yes, Sailor Moon's attack awakened my hidden powers." Tora told her. He turned to the Youma and shot a beam at it. The youma then disintegrated. Hotaru squealed.

"Tora, you're the coolest cat ever! I can't wait to show you to all my friends!" She said. Is the world even ready for a talking cat?

The End!

Sorry this one is a bit show. I was just so excited, I had to right something. Please remember my announcement from the beginning of this and review.


	14. The Outers go to Disney World

Well I finally thought of another one shot

Well I finally thought of another one shot. It's somewhat based on my own trip to Disney World in November 2006. Well enjoy it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon or anything related to Disney.

The Outers go to Disney World

We were all on a plane heading to Florida. I had won my last 10 races and Michiru's CDs were selling like crazy, so we had decided to go to Disney World in Florida with Hotaru and Setsuna. Hotaru was really excited about the trip, Setsuna not so much.

"I still don't know why we just didn't go to the Tokyo Disney Land." She complained.

"Because we want to travel the world." I told her.

"Plus it is the original park." Michiru told her. Setsuna just grumbled some more. Boy, won't she be a pile of fun this week.

"Yeah, I'm going to see Mickey!" Hotaru squealed.

"Don't forget Minnie, Pluto, Donald, Daisy, and Goofy." I told her. She nodded her head. The overhead then came on.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we are about to begin our descend on Orlando, Florida." The Captain announced. "At this time I would like you to fasten your seatbelts and secure and loose articles. Thank you." Looks like the first part of our Disney adventure was about to begin.

After going through customs, we were on a bus to our Disney resort. We were staying at the Caribbean Beach Resort. I found this name ironic since we weren't in the Caribbean's nor did the brochure say it was near a beach. Oh well. Within an hour, the bus arrived at our resort. We got off and claimed our luggage. Now the fun part, checking in. We walked into the front office and went to an open register.

"Welcome to Disney's Caribbean Resort!" The girl at the desk said when we approached. "May I have your party's name?"

"We're the Tenoh party." I told her.

"Um, may you spell that for me?" She asked. Boy, this would be hard. These Americans had about three different or more ways to Romanize my name. I decided to go with the way I liked it.

"T-E-N-O-H." I told her. She typed it into her computer.

"Oh yes, here it is. Haruka Tenoh, Michiru Kaioh, Setsuna Meioh, and Hotaru Tomoe. Is that correct?" I nodded. Thank God we got that on the first spelling. The girl reached under her desk and pulled stuff out. After going through all the stuff, she gave me an envelope with cards in them.

"There is a card in here for all four of you with you names on it. Not only will they open your room, but they are also you ticket for getting into the parks. You just need to insert it into the machine there and give it your fingerprint as identification. That being said, you'll need your own card for entering the parks. It can also be used like a visa to pay for meals and stuff." She explained.

"Thank you." We all said as we left the desk. We waited by the bus stop that would take us to our part of the resort. It took a few minutes, but once we arrived, we had no trouble finding our room. I inserted my card in the door and opened it. I was a nice room with two Queen sized beds. There was a table to sit at and a coffee maker. I opened the cabinet to find the TV. I backed up and lied on the bed to the left of me.

"Michiru and I call this bed." I said. Michiru continued to explore the room. She opened the drawers.

"Not much room in these." She said. She walked into the bath room.

"Oh, I see. The sinks are out here so whoever happens to be on the toilet or taking a bath can have privacy.

"Yeah, Americans just think of everything." I said with my eyes still glued to the TV. Michiru sighed at me.

"We did not come half way around the world to watch TV." She said.

"Then what did we come here for?" Setsuna mumbled. Wow, she was having fun already. I turned of the TV.

"Why don't we go to a park?" I suggested. Michiru squealed and looked over the park brochures we got from the front desk. After looking over them all she decided.

"Why don't we go to Epcot first?" She suggested. I groaned.

"Isn't Epcot the boring 'educational' park?" I complained. Michiru nodded and I moaned again.

"Well there are some rides there I think you would like. One is called Soarin'. It's a ride where you sit in these seats that are lifted up and a screen in front of you displays picture of landscapes from above. It's supposed to make you feel like you're flying." I looked up in interest. That did sound interesting. Being the wind senshi, I loved anything that involved flight and/or going fast. Within minutes, we were waiting for a bus going to Epcot.

The bus was fairly deserted when we got on. Guess Epcot isn't that popular. A few other people got on at the different stops at our resort. Within minutes, we were off to Epcot. It took awhile to get to Epcot. When we finally got there, we got off and headed to the entrance gates. Luckily for us, none of us brought any bag with us today, so we skipped the bag check. We picked the gate with the shortest line. This card thing was simpler then I thought. Just put it in, place finger on scanner, grab card, and head threw gate. We all got threw without any trouble.

"So, now what?" Setsuna asked. Michiru checked the brochures.

"Why don't we do something Setsuna might enjoy first? It's a ride that will show us the history of communication." She said and pointed in front of us. It was called Spaceship Earth. Well I guess it sounded interesting. We entered the building. After walking threw the halls we found the line to be small. That could be dew to the fact that this ride is all a bunch of seats running non stop. We got on rather quickly and was in darkness.

"Are we having fun yet?" Setsuna asked from the front of our 'car' she sat in with Hotaru. Michiru and myself were in the back of the 'car'. This was quit dull. When we finally reached the first think, I wasn't that excited. It was just a wax doll. Some guy narrated over the speakers in our 'car'. All in all, I found it pretty boring. Michiru and Hotaru liked it though.

"Can we go to that Soarin' ride now?" I asked. Michiru looked at the brochure and squealed.

"I want to stop at the aquarium first. It's on the way." Damn Disney for putting the aquarium before the flying ride. I sighed as we headed towards the aquarium. It appeared in order to reach the aquarium, you had to go on a Finding Nemo ride, which was similar to the Spaceship Earth ride. After that ride was over with, we were finally at the aquarium. Michiru had a field day with all the fish there. Well I guess the sea is her natural element. After she was finally done looking at the fish, we headed over to the Soarin' ride. Unfortunately, there was a long line for it. It turned out to be worth the wait. It felt like I was actually flying. I was quit disappointed when it ended.

"So, now where to?" I asked. Michiru was looking at the brochure.

"Here's another one you'll like, Haruka. It's called Test Track. It's a ride that simulates how cars are tested. It says it's the fasted ride here." I grinned with excitement. I ran all the way there. I was disappointed to find another long line. After waiting for an hour, we finally board. I hopped in the front, where the driver's seat would be. Hotaru hopped beside me. Michiru and Setsuna ended up in the back. We all put our seatbelt on and prepared ourselves. This ride was not as fun as it sounded, while it did go fast during the last part, it didn't last long enough. Well it was fun enough for me to buy a picture took during the fast part. Setsuna was screaming like a maniac in the picture.

Looking at the brochure Michiru said, "There's one last ride you would like. It's called Mission: Space. It says it's some sort of spaceship simulation for a mission to Mars."

"Sounds great." I said.

"Let's go on it!" Hotaru piped up.

"We have choices to. We can ether be on the green team or the orange team. The orange one is the intense one. The green one just takes the spinning out."

"Orange." Hotaru and I say at the same time. Setsuna groaned.

"But I wanted green." She complained. I shook my head at her.

"Come on, Setsuna. I know you like green tea, but you're a sailor senshi. You should take the tough mission." With that we dragged her off the orange version of the ride. We waited a while, but finally got on. We were each given rolls at the start of the ride and had to press buttons throughout the ride. It was fun, even though Setsuna screamed like a mad woman during the fun parts. Once we got off, we decided to go back to our resort for the night. We quickly found the bus stop going back to our resort.

While waiting for the bus Setsuna said, "I'm never going on any of those rides again." Well maybe we'd have more luck tomorrow.

The next morning, Michiru woke us all up at 7 much to our displeasure. I groggily sat up.

"I wouldn't mind being woken up this early for 'alone time'." I commented. Michiru smacked the back of my head.

"Setsuna and Hotaru are in the room." She told me.

"Well you two are so loud at home, sometimes I feel like I am in the room when I'm actually outside." Setsuna commented. We both blushed heavily at this. Michiru coughed into her fist.

"Why don't we go down to breakfast now?" She suggested. I nodded in agreement. We all quickly got dressed and went down to the food court. There were a few different types of food stands there. Hotaru and myself settled with the Mickey waffles. Michiru and Setsuna got a more traditional western breakfast, with eggs and bacon. We paid using our cards and found a table. Before eating my Mickey waffle, I took a picture of it. Setsuna stared at me strangely.

"What? It's in the shape of Mickey's head. I want to remember it."

"Right." She said in response.

Once we finished breakfast, we walked outside and I spotted a temporary tattoo stand. I suddenly wanted a tattoo.

"Michiru, can I get a tattoo?" I asked her.

"I want a tattoo too!" Hotaru said.

"Alright, I suppose we have time." Michiru told us. We excitedly ran over to the stand. Hotaru got a rub on Mickey and Minnie tattoo while I decided on an airbrush dragon tattoo. The girl working at the stand placed the template over my arm where I wanted it and sprayed the ink on.

"Now don't get it wet in the next half hour." She told me.

"Sure thing." I told her. "How long will this last anyways?" I asked.

"About 5-7 days. Maybe more." She replied. I wanted this to stay forever. Maybe I should get a real tattoo. Michiru may not approve though.

"Thanks." With that we went back to our room. After much discussion, we decided to go to the Animal Kingdom that day. We boarded the bus there. It took a while to get there. I swear we passed Epcot on the way there. Once we got there, we did the usual going in routine. Setsuna had a bit of trouble with her card the first time, but it worked the second time.

"Well, I guess we can go counter-clockwise around the park this time." Michiru said while looking at her brochure. We ended up in DinoLand first. I spotted a roller coaster there.

"Let's go on that!" I said.

"I don't want to." Setsuna complained. We all sighed and dragged her on. It was rather fun, and freaky at the same time. We all sat in this egg type car. We went up the hill then the ride really started. Not only was the track a factor, but the egg car also spun. Setsuna was screaming her head off the entire time. When we got off, we decided it was time for lunch. We went to a McDonald's sponsored.

"We didn't come half way around the world to eat at McDonald's." Michiru said as we waited in line.

"It's not McDonald's. It's only sponsored by McDonald's." I told her. We all ended up ordering burgers and fries anyways.

After lunch, we went on another roller costar in the Asia section of the park. This one was called Expedition Everest. This one sent us into the mountains and we saw the yeti on it. It went backwards after we saw the yeti which was cool. Setsuna was screaming like a bat out of hell the whole time. It was a very hot day, which is why we decided to go on the Kali River Rapids ride next. Man, did we get wet on that.

Next, we ended up in the Africa section. There we went on a safari tour. Michiru had her camera out the entire time, trying to get good pictures of all the animals there. I had to laugh at her attempts. They weren't going as well as she wanted them to.

Before we left, Hotaru wanted to get autographs from Disney characters. Setsuna went with her while Michiru and I rested.

"So, do you think Setsuna is having fun yet?" I asked Michiru.

"Who knows?" She said. "At least we are." I nodded at that. That was true at least. After Hotaru was finished, we went back to the resort and swam in the swimming pool the rest of the day.

The next day started out like usual. Michiru woke us all up at 7 for breakfast. We hung around the resort for a while. Around 11 we decided to go to the MGM Studios park.

When we got there, Michiru led us to the right of the park. I wondered where we were going.

"There's a Little Mermaid musical show. I have to see it." She told us. Figures, she just has to see anything even slightly related to the sea. When we got to the theatre, the line was rather small. We got in quickly. The show was alright. The girl playing Ariel was rather hot. I liked her. Michiru noticed this and pinched my arm.

After the show was done, Michiru decided to let me pick the next 2 rides. Setsuna became green.

"Why do I have a bad feeling about this?" She asked. I just shrugged. For my first ride pick, I choose the Tower of Terror. We practically dragged Setsuna on that. That ride was scary the first time. They have a lot of build up. First they showed us a creepy video before we get on. Then they took us to the boarding room. The ride itself was designed to be like a platform elevator with seats in it. They even had a chicken elevator for bailers. It took everything we had to keep Setsuna off it. Once we were on it, there was more build up as it showed us more Twilight Zone stuff as we moved forwards. Then it stopped. After a few seconds, it dropped, and then went back up. It did this randomly for awhile before it stopped and took us to be unloaded. While leaving a purchased the picture taken when the ride first dropped. Setsuna was clutching the handles beside her seat for dear life. I'm sure the inners would tease her when they say this.

The next ride I choose was the Rock 'n' Roll Roller Coaster. It was a long wait, but was worth it. I'll tell you now, that this was the only looping coaster there. It was inside and in the dark, so you couldn't see what was coming. I found it fun, but Setsuna was screaming like Usagi at the dentist the entire time. I ended up buying the picture taken when the ride first started going fast. Setsuna even looked like Usagi at the dentist in the picture.

Afterwards, Michiru suggested going on 'The Great Movie Ride'. I don't know what was so great about it. The wait to get on it was long. Then you just sat in a car and went threw scenes from different movies. I suppose some part were cool though, like that alien coming out of the ceiling and scaring Setsuna.

Afterwards, I lead everyone to the Star Wars ride. It was a flight simulator ride. I found it really cool even though it didn't go anywhere, it felt like you did. Hotaru liked it too. We saw various other shows that day, my favorite being that stunt show. When the day was done, we went back to our resort for our nightly activities, no, it involved nothing perverted, you perverts.

The next day started like the other days. Do I need to explain it? No? Good. Well anyways, today was the day we would finally go to the most famous park in Disney world. The Magic Kingdom. While Epcot had its sphere, the Animal Kingdom had it's tree, and the MGM Studios had it's giant Mickey wizard hat, the Magic Kingdom had the castle.

"Let's start in Adventureland, then move to Frontierland, then we'll head over to Tomorrowland, finally we'll go to Fantasyland." Michiru explained. We nodded and headed over to Adventureland.

The first ride we went on there was the Jungle Cruise. We boarded a boat and when around and saw many things, a tour guide narrating us the whole time. It was pretty fun. Next we went on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. It was a cool ride and we saw robotic pirates.

After that we went over to Frontierland. First, since we were so hot, we went on Splash Mountain. The ride was OK. Most of the ride you sat listening to robot animals singing some silly song. The main event was the big drop. First you went up this big hill in a dark cave then dropped down 5 stories. I noticed a flash during the drop and knew I had to get the picture. Michiru was clinging to my arm and Setsuna was screaming like a hyena. I ended up with not only the picture, I also bought a t-shirt.

Next we went on the Thunder Mountain roller coaster. This coaster took us threw a bunch of rocks. I liked it like I have all the other fast rides. Setsuna was screaming like a, I don't know, what haven't I compared her screaming to yet… a mental patient?

We then ventured over to Tomorrowland. I pointed out the first ride I wanted to go on there, the Indy Speedway. We paired up so Michiru and I when in one car, Hotaru and Setsuna in another. I took the drivers seat in my car. Hotaru drove the other.

"You do know these cars are on a track?" Michiru asked me as I got work up over driving. I nodded my head. Despite the track, it was still fun.

Next I led everyone to the Space Mountain indoor roller coaster. It was supposed to be in the dark to. I hoped it'd be as fun as the Rock 'n' Roll coaster was. It turned out the cars only fit 3 people, which meant Setsuna ended up with strangers. This might have been a good thing since I ran out of things to compare her screaming to. I could still hear her screaming though. It was a cool ride. I liked how you couldn't see what was in front of you. It made the turns and hills a surprise.

Afterwards came the worst, and unfortunately most memorable, part of our vaction. Michiru dragged us to the scariest ride in the history of the world. That ride is called "It's a Small World". If only it was.

"But a trip to Disney World wouldn't be complete without going on this ride." Michiru protested.

"Says who?" I responded. She just grumbled and dragged us all in the line. Just standing in line was bad. They had those annoying prop thingys in the loading zone and the music was playing over the speakers.

"Can I get off now?" I asked.

"We're not even on yet." Michiru told me. Really, I could have sworn we were. After 5 agonizing minutes in line, we were finally loaded. As we left, some girl from above was waving at us. I almost wanted to scream "NOOOOOOOOOO!" but didn't. We went through a tunnel, awaiting the horror before us. Nothing could have prepared me for it as a barrage of dolls and bad singing surrounded me. I felt my sanity slipping away slowly.

"See, this isn't so bad." Michiru said from beside me.

"Yes, it is." I replied.

"Can we go on Slash Mountain again? It was like this, but was cooler and had the big splash at the end." Hotaru said. I couldn't agree more with her. Setsuna was twitching in her seat.

"They're everywhere… there's no way out…" She mumbled. The last straw for her came when some kid behind her got all excited over nothing.

"Oh… Mommy! Look at that!" He yelled out and started singing the song along with the creepy dolls. That was it for Setsuna she snapped. She jumped right out of the boat, transformation pen raised.

"Pluto Planet Power, Make Up!" She screamed. I gasped in shock. I didn't know what to be more shocked at, her losing it or her transforming in front of all these people. Pluto faced the dolls. "Dead Scream." She attacked all the dolls and destroyed them. Unfortunately, the music still played.

"I told you we shouldn't have come on this ride." I told Michiru. Pluto was not looking any better.

"It won't stop… won't stop!" She mumbled. She let out a humungous cry as she let lose a wave of power that tore the ride apart. She then grew to a Godzilla like size and went on a rampage around the park.

"We got to do something." Michiru said as Godzilla Pluto approached the castle.

"Agreed." I said. We hoped off of what was left of the ride and found a quite place to transform. We then faced Godzilla Pluto.

"World Shaking!"

"Deep Submerge!" Our attacks hit her, but did nothing.

"Now what?" I asked.

"Should I end the world?" Saturn suggested.

"That's going too far." Neptune told her. The park manager ran up.

"Oh no, it's happened again. Another poor soul has gone crazy from the Small World ride." He said.

"How do we stop her?" I asked.

"The only way she'll return to normal, is if we can remove the song from her head with other music." The manager explains. Neptune and I looked at each other and nodded. Out of nowhere, a piano and violin appears. We began to play the instruments. Godzilla Pluto instantly froze in her tack and began to shrink back into normal Pluto. It had worked. Everyone cheered.

After a few more fun filled days, we finally headed back to Japan. At the Tokyo airport I spotted a newspaper with a headline saying "Monster Sailor Senshi Destroys Disney World" with a picture of Godzilla Pluto on it. I picked up the paper and read it.

"On Wednesday, Sailor Pluto appeared at Disney World. The only problem was, she was huge and destroying the place. Sailor Uranus and Sailor Neptune were able to calm her with their music. Experts say her violent behavior may have been caused by the fact that her planet is no longer considered a planet." A vein popped in Setsuna's head as I read this.

"What?! No longer a planet?!" Before I knew what happened, Godzilla Pluto was terrorizing Tokyo.

The End!

Well I hope you all liked this one shot. I have been on all the rides I mentioned in this story. I certainly had fun writing this. I had my old Disney brochures from the parks in front of me while writing this. Please review.


	15. Celebrity Scandal

Well I've wanted to write another one shot for awhile now and finally came up with a good idea. This one is my own re-write from episode 184, the one where everyone is at Usagi's house and then those media guys show up. Well here's something really crazy that _could_ have happened.

Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon.

Celebrity Scandal

It had been a pretty crazy night so far at Usagi's house. She had only been expecting Seiya that night, but somehow she had ended up with the inner senshi, Taiki, Yaten, as well as Haruka and Michiru at her house. If that hadn't been enough, now there were media guys at her front door wanting to tape her and her friends having dinner. She had no idea what to do now. She really didn't want to deal with the scandal involved in having the Three Lights over at her house. There would probably be swarms of people outside her house for the next few weeks trying to catch a glimpse at the idols.

"This could be bad if we are caught here." Yaten muttered. Usagi turned around to them.

"You have no idea. Who knows what could happen if girls at school think I live with the Three Lights. I'll be swarmed. Not to mention all the people who will probably camp outside my house. How would I explain this to mom and dad?" She ranted. Haruka turned to Michiru and they both nodded. It was their duty to protect their princess from trouble. And right now when there was a big threat looming over all their heads, they needed to keep Usagi as out of the spotlight as possible.

"Haruka and I will create a distraction." Michiru announced. Everyone turned to the two.

"How are you going to do that?" Taiki asked. He really had no idea what would distract the press from caring that they were here. Haruka shook her head at him.

"Never you mind that. Now you three go sneak out the back door. Usagi and the others will let the media guys in and Michiru and I will go into the kitchen and create a distraction for them." She explained. With that she wrapped her arm around Michiru's waist and the two made their way into the kitchen. Everyone just blinked at them.

"Well, I guess we should do what she said." Seiya finally said. They all nodded and moved into place.

Meanwhile in the kitchen, Haruka turned to Michiru with a smirk. She leaned in and whispered in her ear, "Are you ready to cause a distraction?" Michiru giggled at this.

"I don't know, what kind of distraction were you thinking of?" She asked in a seductive voice, having quite a good idea what kind of distraction her lover wanted to make. Haruka grinned at her as she picked her up and placed her on the table. She leaned in and placed a kiss on her lips.

"This kind." She said in a low voice. She then started trailing kisses down Michiru's neck, causing Michiru to moan. Her left hand made it's way down and worked it's way under Michiru's skirt. In the meantime, Michiru's hands worked on Haruka's buttons, undoing them. She smiled when she realized Haruka was not wearing a bra today.

"Did you plan this?" She asked quietly. Haruka smirked as her hand found itself underneath of Michiru's panties, causing the woman underneath her to gasp at the contact.

"No, if I knew this would happen I would have worn my strap-on." Haruka answered as she began to work. The door then opened to reveal the inners and the media guys.

"Oh my god!" They all screamed. At the backdoor, the Three Lights took this as their queue to leave. In the meantime, Usagi's mouth hung wide open, Ami blushed and fainted, Minako had a nose bleed, and Reo and Makoto eyes went wide. The media stood there stunned for a few moments, until one guy realized what was going on.

"Hey, isn't that Michiru Kaioh, the famous violinist?" He asked, "But who's that guy with her." Haruka's head turned and she smirked at them.

"Wait a minute, that's Haruka Tenoh! Remember him? He was that famous junior racer a few years back until he suddenly quit." Another guy pointed out. Haruka just smirked as she turned to face them.

"Glad you remember me." She said. They all gawked at her open shirt that revealed her breasts.

"Oh my god, he's a woman!" One guy yelled. The cameras went wild.

Meanwhile, the Three Lights drove away from the scene in their van. They were all silent, until Seiya finally spoke. "So I wonder what they did to distract the media." In his curiosity, he turned on the TV in the back of the van.

"Oh my god, folks, you won't believe this!" The guy said, "We were expecting just to catch a nice normal dinner, but instead we find famous violinist, Michiru Kaioh and ex-junior racer, Haruka Tenoh having sex on the table. Not only that, but we also found out the Haruka is a woman. You heard right folks, the two are lesbians!" The Three Lights just sweat dropped.

"I thought they wanted to avoid a scandal." Yaten finally muttered after awhile.

In an inn, the other side of Tokyo, Usagi's parents were watching the program with interest.

"Hey, isn't that our house this scandal is taking place at?" Usagi's father asked.

"Oh my." Her mother, Ikkuko said.

"Why is it the one time something interesting happens there, I'm not there to see it?" Her brother, Shingo, muttered.

If this all wasn't bad enough, back at the outer's house, the quickly maturing Hotaru decided to turn into one of her new favorite programs, Celebrity Scandals. Setsuna just sighed, not understanding the youth of today and sat down to watch it with her. However her attention was caught when the words, Lesbian Scandal flashed across the TV screen.

"Tonight," The TV blurted, "Famous violinist, Michiru Kaioh, was caught having lesbian sex with ex-junior racer, Haruka Tenoh, who was discovered to be a woman." A vein popped in the back of Setsuna's head as she listened to the rest of the report, discovering the scandal had happened at Usagi's house.

"Wow, Haruka-papa and Michiru-mama are on this show now! That is so cool! I have famous parents!" Hotaru blurted out and started jumping up and down on the couch. Setsuna on the other hand was not so happy.

"What the hell are those two doing?!?! They know that the princess is in danger! Why the hell are they drawing attention to her house like this?" She screamed in rage. It was then that Haruka and Michiru arrived home.

"We're home!" Haruka cried out. Setsuna promptly ambushed them.

"What the hell were you two thinking?!?!" She cried. Haruka smirked at her.

"Easy Puu, being angry like that will make you age faster." She joked. Setsuna was not amused.

"We were just protecting the princess from the scandal of having the Three Lights at her house." Michiru explained calmly. Setsuna turned to her, foaming at the mouth.

"And you thought a lesbian sex scandal would be better?" She screamed. Haruka laughed at her.

"Relax, Puu, this will all die down." And with that she took Michiru and the two made their way to the bedroom, leaving the angry time guardian standing there in fumes.

The next day, pictures of the couple were on the front of every tabloid, accompanied by scandalous headlines. They were featured on every entertainment show in Japan. Needless to say, people camped outside of Usagi's house for weeks after that, trying to catch a glimpse of a celebrity sex scandal.

The End

Well I hope you liked that crazy one shot. Hopefully I'll have another one soon.


	16. Crash and Burn

**Been awhile since I last uploaded a one shot to this. I don't know why, but I just had a urge to write something for this.**

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Crash and Burn

Michiru, Setsuna, and Hotaru watched from the stands as Haruka's car entered its final lap of the championship race with pure excitement. It had been one hell of a race so far. Haruka was currently setting new records. All through the race she continued to lap the other cars. Currently she had a three lap lead on the second place car, which had won the championship a couple years ago. Once she completed this lap, she would truly make history.

"Haruka-papa has got this one in the bag." Hotaru commented proudly. Michiru nodded at her adopted daughter.

"She'll certainly be in a good mood tonight. It should be a real fun celebration." She said with a mischievous grin. Setsuna rolled her eyes.

"Please remind me to go to bed early tonight with earplugs in." She requested.

"Haruka=papa is on the final stretch!" Hotaru exclaimed. All three women watched excitedly as the car approached the final turn before the finish line, only to be puzzled when it didn't turn and crashed into the barrier.

"Haruka!" Michiru cried out in concern. She tried to rush onto the track to see her lover, but Setsuna held her back.

"Calm down, Michiru. Rushing onto the track is too dangerous and you'd probably only get in the way of the paramedics." The woman told her.

"But I have to know if she's alright!" Michiru watched in concern as the paramedics surrounded her lover's car and began working on getting her out.

"Don't worry, Michiru-mama, it wasn't that bad of a crash. The front of the car is just a bit smooched now. I'm sure Haruka-papa is fine." Hotaru told her. The three women watched intensely and after several minutes the paramedics had Haruka out of the car and on a stretcher.

"Why isn't she moving?" Michiru asked with concern. She didn't like how still and lifeless her lover looked on the stretcher.

"She probably doesn't was to aggregate any injuries she received." Setsuna suggested as Haruka was loaded into the ambulance and taken away. Hotaru stood up.

"Come on, we got to go meet up with her at the hospital." She said, prompting the other two women to get up. Michiru raced to the car, trying to get into get into the driver's seat, but was stopped by Setsuna.

"In your state right now, the three of us would probably end up in a car crash as well." She said calmly. Michiru flared, but decided she didn't have time to argue and got in the passenger's seat. Once everyone was buckled in, Setsuna started the car and calmly drove off. Unfortunately for them, traffic was really bad that day and it took them over an hour to get the nearest hospital. Michiru was fuming when she got out of the car.

"You drive like an old lady!" She told her friends.

"Well I am several millennia years old." Setsuna calmly stated.

"My point exactly, old lady." Michiru hissed.

"Not now, you two!" Hotaru told them, "Haruka-papa needs us." The three went in and got her room number from the information desk. Within minutes, they arrived at the room she was in. Michiru was first to burst through the door.

"Haruka!" She cried as she rushed to her lover's bed, kneeling beside it. Haruka didn't even seem to notice her as she was too busy watching something on TV with headphones on. Setsuna calmly walked over and turned the TV off, getting the blonde's attention.

"So how are you doing? Are you alright after the crash?" She asked her friend. At this question, Haruka hung her head and didn't even seem to notice Hotaru sit on the bed by her feet.

"No, I am not alright." She said flatly. This sparked Michiru's concern.

"What's wrong? Did you break something? Is it a big cut? Is something bruised? Do you need surgery? Do you have a concussion?" Michiru listed everything she could think of. Haruka shook her head, fighting back tears.

"No physically I'm fine except for a few minor cuts and bruises." She said. Michiru let out a sigh of relief.

"Then what's the matter Haruka-papa? Why are you not alright?" Hotaru asked. At her question, Haruka broke down and started sobbing in her hands.

"I had a three lap lead and I blew it at the last possible moment!" She cried. "I saw the finish line and got so excited I forgot I had to turn! I can't believe I did that! I should be hoisting the championship trophy right now while everyone cheers my name!" Everyone sat stunned.

"But honey, there's always next year." Michiru told her. Haruka turned to her with and angry look in her red, tear filled eyes.

"That's little comfort to me right now!" She spat, "I had a chance to prove myself in a big way today. I had the chance to make history with my over whelming performance, but now I'm just making history as the biggest fail and everyone is laughing at me."

"Well I'm sure no one will remember by tomorrow." Setsuna said, trying to comfort her friend.

"Oh don't try to pull that B.S. on me, Setsuna!" The blonde spat at her, "I know you can see into the future and can see that fifty years from now I'll be featured as number one on the top ten biggest racing fails in history. I was actually watching it the list last night on the news, and my crash was ten times worst then all those fails combined!"

"Please don't jump to conclusions, Haruka-papa." Hotaru said.

"I was watching the sports news as you came in. They were all laughing at me! Said they had never seen anything like it before and probably never will again. My fans are also in shock. They're so disappointed in me right now. " Haruka sobbed. Michiru just sighed.

"You know, if you keep moping like this, this really will eat you up and spell the end of your career." She told her lover. "How do you think I feel whenever I misplay a note at one of my concerts?"

"But you don't misplay notes." Haruka said.

"I'm human, Haruka, I make mistakes. But I don't let the mistakes take over and lead to more mistakes being made. That's what you got to do right now." She said. Haruka sat there silently.

"I think Michiru-mama is right. You just got to go out next season and race like the crash never happened." Hotaru said.

"But the fans and media won't let me live it down." Haruka said.

"Just don't listen to them. Is what they think really that important to you anyways?" Setsuna said. Haruka thought about this.

"You guys are right. I just got to move on and forget about having crashed. Instead I should just focus on the positives. I did have a three lap lead on a really experienced racer. If I don't let the crash consume and burn me, I should easily be able to win the championship next year and put all the doubters to rest." She finally said. Her family all smiled and gave her a hug.

"I knew you could get over this." Michiru said.

"But, Haruka-papa, how were you burned in the crash?" Hotaru wondered, "I saw no fire or smoke." Haruka just laughed.

"It was just a metaphor."

The End

* * *

**So some inspiration for this idea came from me being a Toronto Maple Leafs fan and the shock I was in after Monday night's game. For those who don't follow hockey, what happened was they blew a 4-1 lead in the third period of game seven and lost in over time. Took me a few days to get over the disappointment I was feeling. I guess some comfort was that it was only round 1 and not the Stanley Cup final, but still... **


End file.
